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“Thanks, it was so hot in Florida that the first thing I did was get a haircut, but with my natural frizz it looked like I had an afro,” I say with a small laugh, remembering how awful that was. “So my aunt took me to her friend, and she did this cool relaxation thing. I think I might keep it this way.”
I grab my clothes then walk over to the shared bathroom and get dressed. I only have summer PJs, and I worry that someone is going to comment on my thighs. I might have lost weight at the gym and rollerblading, but I still have some thick thighs. Yeah, they may be muscular now, but still.
I take a deep breath and do some of the exercises my therapists drilled into my brain during my stay at the clinic.
I am beautiful, curves and all.
If they don’t love me, then fuck them.
I love my body and that’s what matters.
A knock on the door pulls me from looking into the mirror and saying my affirmations. “Hey, so we better go or Marsha will be back. She’s super annoying when she gets a bug up her ass,” Lyra says through the wood.
“You got this, Cassie,” I whisper quietly, then smile. It’s time for my first college experience.
“Coming!” I shout.
* * *
“Oh my God,Florida sounds amazing right now. Is that why you’re so tan?” Aleena, one of my new neighbors, says as we snack on some fruit and veggies. The sandwiches look amazing, but I’m not ready to eat anything with carbs in front of Lyra. I know that’s something I will need to get over, but for my first night here, I’ll suffer.
“Oh yes, I spent a lot of time on the beach or rollerblading on the boardwalk. I’ll need to find something here to keep active,” I say quietly and another girl, Dena interrupts.
“You should look into roller derby. I couldn’t hack it, those girls are brutal, but if you skate, it should be a walk in the park for you,” she says, giving my body a good look. I try not to flinch or cross my arms over my stomach, hiding what’s no longer there. “Yeah, girl you definitely have the body to take some ladies on the track.”
I blush and thank her when Lyra makes her way over to me. She’s more subdued than I’m used to, and if I’m being honest, I’m a little freaked out. I have known Lyra for almost three years, and she has never not tossed a cutting remark or an insult under her breath as she passes me. I’m about to call Bella and ask if something happened to make her so… Not exactly nice, but maybe tolerable.
“Okay ladies, let’s all set up our sleeping bags and start the real party,” Marsha says, pulling a bottle of alcohol out from behind her back with a naughty smile. She shoots me a wink, and Lyra gently touches my arm.
“Do you want to take that corner over there?” she asks, and I nod as I follow her. We didn’t have sleeping bags so we grabbed a few blankets and pillows. She sets us up on a makeshift bed, and I can’t help but hesitate to sit beside her.
Sitting gingerly, I cover my legs with the blankets. I’m not comfortable being so close to her yet. Lyra chats with everyone, but her eyes keep drifting over to me. I’m not used to the attention, but since she’s not being mean, I’m finding I don’t mind it. It’s kinda nice.
Taking a sip of the alcoholic drink that Martha made, I listen to her advice.
“Alright girls, the campus is usually really safe, but last year, a girl went running and was attacked while she was out. Linda hasn’t been found, and her roommate hasn’t seen her since. Campus police suggest that we go out with a buddy,” Marsha says with a shrug. “Honestly, I think there’s nothing to worry about, so for now, find a friend to go out with. Most of us are always looking for someone to eat with or a study partner anyway.”
Biting my lip, I wonder if we need to worry. I’m new here, at the very least, it’s a good excuse to meet people.
Dena leans in to talk to me with a grin. “I volunteer to be your buddy,” she teases. “I love your smile and feel like I need to see more of it.” I give her a grin, and Lyra freezes beside me. I glance her way, and her eyebrows are furrowed. I’m probably going to have to tell her I prefer girls now, but that can wait.
Marsha frowns as she watches us from across the room. I don’t know why she’s upset.
“So… maybe we can grab dinner tomorrow if you want?” Dena asks with a smile.
My cheeks heat, and I blame how easily I get flustered, even now. “I have a bunch of late classes, but how does Wednesday sound?”
Marsha leans forward, unable to stay silent. “Make sure you have someone that lives in our building walk you back with everything happening…okay? Safety first!”
I nod. “I’ll make sure to do that,” I murmur. I turn to speak to Dena, but she’s already turning away.
The next hour goes by quickly, and my eyes start to droop. I’m fading fast. Yawning, I lay down, and I can see a few other girls have given up and fallen asleep.
“Good night, girls,” Marsha says softly, turning out the light in the common room we converted into our own huge slumber party space. Tonight’s been fun. I’ve never been to a slumber party before.
Lyra rolls over to face me, but her eyes are closed. She scooches closer to me and sighs contently when my leg touches hers. I’m frozen, afraid that she’ll wake and snap at me for touching her.
Afraid to breathe, I stare at her. She’s gorgeous, and it looks like she’s done well while I’ve been gone. My time away worked for both of us. I hope I can get to know this new Lyra, and that it’s not just a phase.
