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I don’t react, but he doesn’t expect me to.
“So why am I here? And what are you going to do with me if you don’t think you’re going to get me to talk?” I ask.
He runs his hand through his hair and chuckles. “I honestly don’t know what we do next.”
It makes me smile, the softest, most genuine reaction I’ve had in a long time. It makes me ache for things to have been different. For my life to have been my own. For me to have met Lennox in a different life, in a different world. Maybe then we would have dated, fallen in love, gotten married, and started a family. Maybe we would have gotten a happily ever after.
My smile drops.
Lennox frowns at the sight.
“I don’t know all the ways you’ve been hurt—just that you have. By Andrea. By Beckett. By others. By me. You’ve been hurt too many times. You’ve lost any man you thought of loving. You’ve had your future taken from you over and over again. Been told who to marry, who to have babies with.”
He pauses, exasperated. “I want answers. I want the truth. And I want to share mine with you. But tonight isn’t the night. We both need rest. And I need a doctor if I’m going to survive long enough to convince you to trust me.”
His gaze finally rakes up and down my body. He starts at my bare thighs, letting his eyes rest on the slit of fabric between my legs, over the lace on my stomach, then resting on my nipples. His desire grows, causing my nipples to harden. I know he notices. I know he knows what his gaze does to my body.
But I also know he saw how my body reacted to Andrea.
He doesn’t know who I love and who I hate.
He doesn’t know my endgame any more than I know his.
But damn him for knowing how to turn me on without even touching me. I’m wet between my legs, and desire builds within my core. I’m aching and needy. If Lennox asked, I don’t think I could help but say yes.
Lennox’s tongue laps over his teeth.
Fuck.
I’m about to open my mouth to tell him to fuck me when I see his legs shake. He can barely even stand on his own two legs much longer.
So I cross my arms across my chest as sense floods back into me. “I’m not your wife—not any longer. My father won’t let our marriage stand after what you did to me. And I’ll never forgive you.”
“I love you,” he says so softly and tenderly. It’s not a game. It’s not a lie.
“And I love him,” I say.
“He’s dead. I’m sorry, but loving him won’t bring him back. I should know.”
“That’s not who I was talking about,” I spit back.
His eyes widen as if I’m confirming his worst fears. But he can’t stand much longer. He needs help. And so this conversation will have to continue another time.
“You don’t love Andrea.”
I don’t say anything. There is nothing left to be said.
“I won’t let anyone hurt you. Sleep, Rialta. You’re safe.” Lennox pushes the dresser far enough for him to slip through the door.
I get out of bed and immediately push the dresser back in front of the door.
I’m safe, Lennox says. I’m not. I never will be. And I’m not sure I want to live a safe life anyway. Safe is boring. Safe doesn’t get me what I want. Safe doesn’t give me a reason to live.
Chapter 9
Lennox
“You should rest longer,” Hayes says as I walk past him in the hallway.
