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He signaled the waiter and he came running. “Could we have some coffee?”
“Certainly, Mr. St. Clair.”
He turned to me after the waiter left. “Juliet, I think you’re great. Your socks are great. Your hair, your eyes…” He sighed. “You’re a very attractive woman, but I shouldn’t be flirting with you, complimenting you, and asking you about the lifestyle. I shouldn’t have asked you to dinner. Even though you’re submissive, we wouldn’t be a good fit as a couple.”
“Oh, okay.” My blush was back, scalding heat crawling over my skin. “I mean, I wasn’t really asking to become, you know, involved with you.”
“I know. And you shouldn’t.”
I glanced at the ravaged plates between us. “This was just a friendly dinner, right?”
“Right. So what am I doing?”
I looked down at my lap, as our civilized conversation unraveled and split apart. “I thought you wanted to make a better impression on me.”
“I did. I wanted to, but I shouldn’t. I’m not an asshole like your parade of charismatic whore Doms, but I’m not relationship material either. I can’t emphasize that strongly enough.”
My parade of charismatic whore Doms?I felt insulted. “You’re the one who invited me here,” I pointed out.
“Because there’s something about you that attracts me. There are so many things about you that turn me on.”
“All right. I get it.” Now I was the one looking up into the vines because I couldn’t meet his gaze. Also, because I was getting tearful. “You just hoped to sleep with me. You find me attractive in a sexual way.”
I saw his denial in my blurred peripheral vision. “I find you attractive in a way that your…your hair is braided like that, and your eyes are so blue, and you have this weird intensity of feelings and arty-ness and…” He waved his hands, searching for words the way Goodluck sometimes did. “The problem is, this can’t go anywhere.” His hands moved between us and came to rest on the table with a thump of finality. “We would never work out.”
“Wow.” What was I supposed to say? Our friendly dinner had suddenly turned into,You’re quirky and hot but I don’t want you, and I don’t know why I asked you out.Why had I expected this to go any other way but fucked up and sideways?
“Juliet. God, I didn’t mean to upset you, but I know I have.”
“It’s okay. I wasn’t even going to come tonight,” I said, putting my balled-up napkin on the table. “I almost texted you. More than once. I get it, because I’m obviously…” I narrowed my eyes at him. “Obviously not relationship material either.”
“I know I sound rude, but I didn’t mean it that way. Honestly, I didn’t. Forgive me.”
His gentle apology, his sincerity only made me feel worse. I sat up very straight and spoke quietly but firmly, half to him and half to a sparkling vine located just beyond his shoulder.
“You know, I feel shitty enough about the state of my life. I spend my days in Goodluck’s shadow and my nights wishing I had someone to love, to the point where I’m chasing after guys I shouldn’t, and letting them break my heart. I’m a single, thirty-two-year old woman in New York City, and I agreed to come to dinner because you seemed so polite and elegant—” I swallowed the rest of the words as I stood to push in my chair. He wasn’t getting compliments from me. “Anyway, I don’t want to feel any more bad things, and I don’t like coffee, so I’m leaving.”
“Juliet, wait.” He stood and took my hand. “Wait and I’ll drive you home.”
“I think I’ve let you drive me home one too many times already.”
He leaned down, catching my gaze with fervent sincerity. “I’m trying to protect you from being hurt again. To protect you from me.”
“Oh, that’s very selfless,” I said, extricating my hand from his grasp. “Thanks. Please stay and enjoy the coffee if you’d like. You deserve it for being soprotective.”
“Jewels, don’t go.”
Fuck him and hisJewels. His stern orders had no effect on me because I wasn’t doing kink anymore. I wasn’t doing guys anymore. They were all idiots, and this one was easily one of the worst. He was protecting me from him? What did that even mean? Why had he led me on, even flirted with me, if this was his endgame?
And if he was so dangerous, why had I been the one handcuffed to his bed?
I picked up my coat and sailed out the front door. Where was his fucking driver? There weren’t any cabs to jump into, just texts from Fort toPLEASE WAIT.
I started walking, pulling my coat around me. Before I could get very far, Fort took my arm and turned me around, staring at me with a pained expression. He breathed in, his chest rising so violently I processed it as anger, although I knew it was something else.
“Let go of me,” I said.
When I took a step back, he circled me with his arm, preventing escape. His other hand cupped my jaw. His scent enveloped me as he pressed his lips to mine.
