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“He’s not going to do something he can’t afford. Are you gonna keep trying to contact him?”
“Yes. I plan to go to his house tomorrow after I leave work. Although he’s resisting me right now, I know he needs me. His sister is there right now, but eventually, she’s going to go home, and besides her, I’m the only person he shows his sensitivity to. I can’t leave him hanging. In the back of my mind, I’m hoping that he doesn’t tell me to leave. He can be so hard at times.”
“If he pushes you away, then what?”
“I’m going to push harder.”
She smiled at me and kissed my cheek. “That’s my girl. If you ever need to talk, I’m always here for you. You know I won’t judge you. I’m your mother. If anyone knows where you’re coming from or why you feel the way you do, it’s me.”
“I know.”
“I need to ask you a personal question.”
I remained silent and swallowed hard as I nodded. “Did sex with Van trigger you in any way? You were extremely quiet when you came home and yesterday too.”
“It didn’t trigger me, but I found myself succumbing to habit. In order to endure Jules’s abuse, I would often pretend I was somewhere else with someone else. I found myself doing that with Van. He noticed and kept asking if I was okay. I’d zoned out.”
My mother slid her arm around me and rested her head against mine. “I did that with Jonas a few times after I was raped. He didn’t take too kindly to it.”
We remained quiet until she asked, “How did things go with being around Kaysyn and Seneca?”
“I did my best to avoid them. She seemed nervous though. She should be.”
Manman took a deep breath. I knew she wouldn’t give her thoughts on that subject. I didn’t do anything wrong. I was going to show up in court, answer the questions I was asked, and that judge was going to side with me. Turning to my mama, I said, “I won’t make it through that without Jungle. So I have a week to get my friend back.”
“You’ll have him back. How will you feel if he still didn’t want to be anything more than friends?”
“I don’t know, but I have to stop cutting him completely off. That’s fucking with him. He was so happy to see me Tuesday.”
She nodded. “So what do you have planned for the rest of the day?”
“Whitney wants me to look at a dress.”
“Oh. Well, it will be all three of us. She called me about that earlier before the wedding started.”
I nodded then stood and went to my room to change into something more comfortable. After lying in bed, I tried calling Jungle again, suffering the same fate. He didn’t answer. I texted him.Jungle, please call me. I want to be there for you. I’m not going to stop calling and texting. I’m sorry for ghosting you yet again. It’s because I’m in love with you. My feelings for you are so strong. I need more than just friendship and not being able to have that had me retreating. I need to be sure you’re okay though. Please talk to me. I love you.
I rested my phone on my chest and hoped like hell I would hear from him soon. I needed him just as much as he needed me.
CHAPTER9
JUNGLE
“What the fuck happened to her?” Rondo asked.
“My sister went apeshit on her ass. She was trying to get inside my organization to take me out. She wasn’t going to take me out, but her cousin supposedly was. They wanted revenge for the death of her cousin’s brother. She said he’s not her cousin, because she’s kin on a different side of the family, but whatever. The nigga she was seeking revenge for, killed my dad and brother then raped and tried to kill my sister,” I said as I sat next to Fawn and squeezed her hand.
“She’s the mother of my daughter.”
“That’s why she’s still alive,” Fawn said. “I was going to kill that bitch. What I went through after my father and brother’s deaths was horrific. Jungle was locked up. All that shit was orchestrated by Slice and another muthafucka from Laredo. Had my husband been a few minutes later, they would have killed me too. So she better be glad she’s connected to someone Jungle knows, or she would be in a fucking incinerator by now.”
All my boys were here. Well, most of Watchful Eyes. Chad and Shy were still at the reception, but Ali said they would be over here as soon as they could get away… along with DJ. Rondo slid his hand down his face as I said, “I’m sorry it came to this. I never remembered you even saying your baby mother’s name.”
“It’s not your fault. This shit is on her, and I’m going to seek custody of my daughter. Did she say which cousin?”
“Somebody named Darlena.”
He rolled his eyes. “I never could stand her ass. When Kennedy and I were together the first time, she kept up mess. We were all living in Alabama at the time. Once we called it quits, I moved back home. I can’t believe she was fucking around on me. She had me convinced that we were making things right between us. My daughter was so happy that we were getting along. Fuck!”
