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“So, what are you saying? That the intimidating and ruthless Giovanni is an act? That is not who you are?” She folded her arms as she raised one eyebrow at me and I sighed. I could so easily say what she wanted to hear right now. Pretend that the darkness in me was an act, but I would be lying. It was as much a part of me as the side she knows.
“No. That is also real. I can’t help who I am, Olivia. But what I am saying is that I am not that person when I am with you. I never will be,” I said softly. I tried to step towards her again but she turned and walked into the kitchen, keeping a safe distance from me. I frowned. I wanted to hold her so badly. I hated that I was the reason she was in pain. If only she would let me, I could fix it. I could make it go away.
“I need to know,” she spoke to the kitchen counter as her head hung down between her arms that were leaning on the surface. I stayed still, mentally preparing myself for what I knew was coming. The questions. “I need to know it all.”
Mamma’s words echoed in my head. I had to answer every question honestly, no matter how bad it got. No matter how much I wanted to protect her from it all. She deserved the truth. Only then could she truly know what it would mean to stay with me. To choose me.
“Ask me anything,” I muttered as my heart dropped. After this, she would either accept me or leave me. And there was nothing I could do about it.
She stood up straight and her enchanting eyes locked with mine. This time they were full of fear and my heart shattered into a million pieces.
“Are you a murderer?”
Confessions Part 2
Olivia
“Are you a murderer?”
My heart was like a wild beast in a cage as I stared into his dark eyes. I could see the truth in them before he even opened his mouth.
“I have killed men. Yes.” I held his gaze as I gulped. I had prepared myself for his answer but it still didn't make it easier to hear.
“How many?” My voice shook as the fear took over. But it was odd. I wasn’t scared of him like I thought I would be when hearing those words. It was a fear of not being able to take it. Of not being able to handle his darkness. Hearing what he was capable of could break me and I had no control over it. I had no idea how I would feel once I knew all of this and it was terrifying. Walking away from him was terrifying, but so was choosing to stay.
“Too many to list,” his jaw clenched, and his eyes filled with pain as he held my gaze. The silence stretched between us as I tried to hold my nerve.
“Why do you kill people? For fun?” I asked shakily. It was a stupid question, I know, but it was the first thing that came to mind. Henry killed Nate for fun. He did it because he could. There was no good reason behind it and, even though I didn’t believe anyone had the right to take someone’s life, I prayed Giovanni had a better reason for doing it than the thrill.
He frowned. His dark eyebrows pulled down into the bridge of his nose as he huffed loudly. “No. It is not for fun. Although I would be lying if I said some of the men I killed deserved it and I took pleasure from ending their lives.”
My eyes widened at his words. The words of a psychopath. A demented soul. Yet when I looked at him, he was still Gio. It was confusing. “Why did they deserve it?”
“Part of our business is that we are hired to kill fucked up people. People who have done wrong to others. Murderers, rapists, paedophiles, sex traffickers. I enjoy killing them,” his voice was hard, but every word had an edge to it. A hesitance. He was being brutally honest with me in order to gain my trust back, no matter what the cost. “But there are times when I have killed men for less. That is when I have to switch off my emotions and see it for what it is. Business.”
“So, you always do it for money?” My curiosity was overriding my fear now as the questions came flying out of me with ease.
“Mostly. Yes.” I narrowed my eyes, wanting him to elaborate. “Sometimes power. Sometimes revenge. We have rivals. Enemies. People who want to harm my family. We are the most powerful family in Northern Italy, which puts a target on our backs. Call it jealousy or a need to overthrow us, but our rivals will stop at nothing to tear us down.” He took one step closer to me and I fought the urge to move back. He was testing me. To see if I feared him now. When I didn’t move, the faintest smile played on his lips before his face returned to its intensity.
“So, you kill each other? Other mafia families?”
“We want to kill each other, yes. But there is a law. A commission made up of all the heads of families in Italy. We all signed a declaration of peace making the heads of families untouchable without consequences. If one head breaks the treaty, all hell can break loose.”
“So instead, you torture each other? Take their eyes?” I dropped one hip with sass and crossed my arms as his face creased with confusion. Realisation hit him and his eyes widened.
“How do you know- “
“That you took a man’s eye? I met him. Nice bloke,” I replied sarcastically. His face changed completely. And now I truly was scared. Of him. It was the same expression he had the day we were in the piazza and the night I found him in the gym. Controlled rage and evil.
“What?” His voice was low and gritty, and my heart jumped into my throat. I took a step back and my body hit the fridge door. “Fucking talk to me Liv before I lose my shit. How did you meet him? Did he hurt you?”
“N-no. Last night. I went to the shops and when I came out a man…” I paused as my breathing became erratic from the look of rage on his face. “He kidnapped me. Put me in the car and they told me about you. About who you are.”
He was so close to me now, but he wasn’t seeing me. He was looking right through me in his fury. “Who? Who did that to you?”
“Lorenzo and Riccardo Leone.”
He turned away from me abruptly, his hand on his jaw. His other hand was clenching and unclenching into a fist at his side. I could feel his extreme anger radiating from him. “Did they touch you? Tell me the truth, Liv. Did they harm you in any way?”
