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The man holding a knife to my throat slowly started walking backwards with me in his arms towards the SUV where another man was hanging out the car door, gun poised at Vinny.
"Riccardo la vuole viva, (Riccardo wants her alive)," I heard him hiss to my kidnapper. A tear rolled down my cheek as I accepted my fate. They would take me. Maybe for ransom, more likely to torture me for information.
And then the world exploded in chaos. Three SUVs came skidding to a halt down the road and, using the distraction, Vinny grabbed the man’s arm quickly, twisting it behind his back, pulling his body in front of his as a shield from the gunshots that the man hanging out the car suddenly sent his way. I saw Sal and our men crouching behind their cars as they opened fire on our attackers and Vinny pushed the dead man's body away and raced towards me.
“Noooo!” I screamed as the man holding me threw me to the ground and pulled out his own gun. I saw it in slow motion. The bullet left the man’s pistol and hurtled through the air straight into Vinny’s chest. He stumbled forward, clutching his wound, and his eyes found mine. Another shot was fired. Piercing his shoulder. He fell to his knees.
“NOOOO!” I scrambled to my feet as Vinny’s body took another bullet to the chest. Sal raced in front of him and shot my attacker in the head with perfect aim as I scrambled towards Vinny on the floor. Pools of blood were seeping out under his body, and I threw myself on his chest. “No! Vinny!”
His eyes locked with mine and he raised his bloody hand to my face, cupping my cheek. “Ti amo con tutta l’anima. (I love you with all my heart)”
“No. No. Vinny!” I watched as life drained out of his eyes and his hand dropped down to the floor. “Ti amo! Ti amo Vinny!” I cried as the tears fell uncontrollably down my face, blurring my vision.
I felt a strong arm around my waist hoisting me off the floor and I clawed and struggled against it, trying to get back to Vinny’s lifeless body.
“He is gone, CeCe! We have to go! More are coming. I have to get you to safety,” Sal’s pained voice echoed in my ear, but I couldn’t listen. I screamed and struggled against him as he pulled me away from my husband. My love.
A vibrating noise jolted me awake and I touched my damp face as I tried to breathe through the insufferable pain. The heartbreak that would never leave me because that wasn’t just a dream. That was reality. That was how I lost my Vinny and I have just lived through it all over again. I could feel the darkness inside me clawing to let it take hold.
Give up. He is gone. There is nothing but despair without him.
No. That is not true. There is family. My children.
The vibrating stopped and the screen on my phone flashed showing a missed call. I rubbed my face and wiped my tears away, taking a shaky breath. I checked the time and saw that it was 7am. The vibrating started again. Groaning, I leaned over to the bedside table and picked up my phone. I closed my eyes when I saw the caller ID. Sal.
“Ciao,” I grunted into the phone.
“Cecilia,” Sal’s deep voice resounded into my ear, and I took in a sharp breath. It felt too raw to hear his voice right now after that flashback. “How did the deal go? Was it worthwhile?” He was straight to business as usual.
“Yes. It is done. Gio haggled a good deal, and they will use us for our connections with the Columbian channels. I am sure Gio can fill you in with the details when we are back.” I said frankly, trying to make it clear that I did not want to speak to him right now.
“Bravo. I need Giovanni back tonight.”
“Tonight?” My stomach dropped. I was dreading going home. I wanted to stay here in this little bubble of bliss a little longer.
“I will be visiting tomorrow.”
“Okay.”
There was a pause, and I was growing more restless by the minute. I could tell there was more he wanted to say.
“How are you?” His tone was laced with concern which made me prickle.
“Fine, you?” I faked my sweet sincerity.
“CeCe. Giovanni mentioned you were not doing so well at the moment. I wish you would let me take care of you,” his tone softened slightly from its usual sharpness, and I felt my anger rising.
“I am fine. I do not need you to look after me, Salvatore. I appreciate your concern, but it is unnecessary.”
He released a frustrated breath down the phone. “You know what I mean. If you would only open up to me, let me help you, CeCe.”
“Like I said. I am fine. And don’t call me that. Only one man ever called me that.”
I knew that would piss him off, but I couldn’t help it. He needed to know he could never replace Vinny.
“Have you taken your drugs Cecilia?” Gone was the kindness and warmth in his tone. It was now replaced with bitterness.
“Maybe you should be on them instead of me. It seems you have a split personality just as much as I do!” I snapped and hung up the phone. I was livid. Throwing back the covers and walking into the bathroom, I splashed my face with cold water. My hands were shaking as I opened the cabinet and took out my happy pills. I threw them back and stared at my empty reflection. Another day of numbness.
