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“And you’ll have more,” he grits out. “I’m calling in two additional. They’ll be here shortly.”
I bite back the urge to tell him that’s overkill. As much as I really dislike having these random guys following me everywhere I go, I know it’s necessary. And, truth be told, it does make me feel safer.
“Thank you, Santi.”
He lingers, his eyes moving to Georgie and Solana on the sofa, and then back to me. “Are you sure you don’t want to come home?”
“This is my home,” I croak even though that’s not exactly true. There’s only one place that feels like home now, and it isn’t here or the manor.
Santiago looks distraught by the idea, as if he’s only just now realizing that he’s losing me. When he sent me away, I’m sure it was in his mind that I’d be back eventually. But now things have changed permanently without any real time to accept it.
“I just want you to be safe,” he says.
“I will,” I assure him. “I’ll be extra careful.”
“And you’ll call me if you need anything,” he adds.
“Of course.”
He nods reluctantly. Then there’s a knock on the door, and everybody tenses. Only, I know before Santi even moves who it is. There is only one person who can knock like that.
“Santi.” I capture my brother’s arm, and he pauses to look at me. “Tell him I’m asleep.”
His brow furrows, but he nods, and I move around to hide behind the door when Santi cracks it open. There’s a moment of tense silence, and then Judge’s acknowledgment of my brother’s presence.
“Santiago.”
“Judge.”
More silence. Then a sigh.
“Is everything okay?” Judge grits out. “The guards seem to be on high alert.”
“Everything’s under control,” Santi answers vaguely.
I already know without looking at him that Judge won’t like this.
“Where is she?”
“Asleep.”
“Why are you here in the middle of the night?” Judge asks.
“Why are you?” Santi replies.
I swallow, waiting for this to be over. The terrible part is, I want to see him. I want to open the door and invite him in and curl up in the shelter of his arms. More than anything, that’s what I want. But Judge can’t be my safety net anymore. I can’t fall back into that trap.
“Her phone number was transferred,” Judge says quietly. “I wanted to make sure she was alright. She hasn’t answered my texts.”
“Maybe that’s because she doesn’t want to,” Santi snaps.
I feel the pain of that verbal blow, and I have to press my fingers to my lips to stop myself from telling him that’s not true. This is what addicts are supposed to do, right? Cut off their drug of choice cold turkey? I understand now why it’s so hard. I want him. I crave him. At times, I feel like I might die without him. In his warmth, nothing can touch me. Everything is okay for those fleeting moments. But then I remember the pain when he leaves me cold. And I know in my soul, for the sake of my heart, this is what I have to do.
“I know you’re angry with me, Santiago,” Judge continues. “But we want the same things for her. I want her to be safe. I want her to be happy.”
“You have a funny way of showing it.”
“I set up an account for her.” He shuffles around, reaching for something before I hear him hand it to Santiago. “This is for her to take care of anything she needs. She and the babies.”
