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Releasing a soft sigh, he nods. “Yeah. Kind of.”
Not sure I want to know what he means by that. “Okay then. Where should we do this?” I tug on the collar of my shirt, feeling like every piece of clothing on my skin is choking me.
He laughs, his eyes bewildered. “Never did I think I'd witness the day when Enrico Herrera was so shaken up by something.”
I narrow my eyes on him, shifting from side to side. “I have to remind people I'm human somehow.”
“You've never done this before, have you?”
“Yes,” I say, almost too quietly, the lie stinging at my throat.
“The truth,pequeño.”
I shrink into myself, releasing a shuddery breath. “No. You?”
“Yes.”
My stomach does somersaults. “Not the answer I was expecting.”
He purses his lips. “I know. I've been around longer than you. I have experience in a lot of things you don't know about. Now come here.” He sits on the couch, adjusting a few throw pillows before slightly spreading his thighs. Fuck. The man always has me so damn hungry and thirsty all at once.
“Drop your pants and lie across my lap like a good boy.” He pats his knee and I nearly melt into the floorboards.
I stay where I am, unable to move my feet, releasing a rush of uneven breaths.
“You still with me, pequeño?” He cocks his head, his large hands resting at his sides.
“I uh… y-yeah.” My words are broken and I wish I could get a better grip on myself. Fernando has seen me at my worst, and if I'm safe with anyone, it's him.
“Bueno.” He pats his knee again. “You have until the count of three and then I'll spank you where you stand. Uno…”
I hurry his way and stand in front of him, tugging at my clothes, and my gun crashes to the floor.
“Dos…”
I kick everything away and crawl over him. I lie across his lap, resting my head on a pillow.
Gripping the cushions, my body trembles as I'm overcome with anticipation.
A large, warm hand runs up and down my back, calming every part it touches. “Easy. You're safe with me.”
Relaxing against him, I close my eyes and nod into the pillow. “I know.” That's the problem. His touches and hugs have me feeling too at ease and it terrifies me. Handing over this much of myself to someone shouldn't feel this damn good.
“You're doing so well, pequeño. We're going to start off with two rounds of ten. I'm going to use my hand and you will leave your underwear on. I won't be so lenient next time.”
Warmth envelops my body. “Next time?”
“Yes. We are still playing, remember?”
My head spins in circles and I want to keep believing in the fantasy for as long as I can. “Si. Next time I'll try to be a better boy for my Sir.”
His face remains unreadable as I glance back at him.
“I hope so. Now that we are on the same page, do you know about traffic light colors?”
“Yes.” I've done my research and am very aware of safe words and other ways to end or slow down a scene. The longer I’ve read about being submissive, the more it enticed me. I want to know what it’s like to hand over all the decision making to someone else for once—to have them be in control and care for me. I want to take a break from a life that demands too much. I’ve gotten small glimpses of what it would be like with Fernando. His overprotectiveness and need to scold me has been a gateway to my discovery of a lifestyle I never knew I could want before, and it has me craving more.
“Tell me what each one stands for.” His deep, commanding voice has me coming out of my stupor.
