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“She was a lesbian. She writes about Don knowing and being fine with it because he had a lot of women on the side. She’d been with Bridgette for a long time. I don’t know how long, because this only goes back so far, but what if there are more? There could be boxes of them in the attic.”
Remy stood up and shook his head. “Why…why the fuck would Don react the way he did if he knew about it?”
“She wanted to move into the cottage with Bridgette and take us with her. She loved Bridgette and wanted her to be in our lives. She makes some real weird jokes about Bridgette being called step-mommy that made me very uncomfortable, but that’s fine. So, our sweet mother was a freak. Not my business.” I shuddered. “Don started fighting with her about Bridgette when he realized it wasn’t just a fling. Sex was fine, but Mom was talking love and family.”
“She wanted to move us in with her and Bridgette?” Boone’s voice was barely above a whisper. “That’s a far cry from leaving us behind and never coming back.”
I swallowed a wave of emotion at knowing she wanted us. “I wish Don was still alive. He deserves far worse than dying in his sleep.”
Remy held out his hand. “I need to read it. I can’t wrap my head around this.”
I reluctantly handed it off to him and watched as he and Boone leaned in to read it together. I looked over at the scotch they’d been drinking and grabbed the bottle. I needed something to take the edge off as I waited for them.
61.
***Memphis***
Beapacedinfrontof the couch, clutching a bottle of water in her hands so hard the plastic was making awful noises. She still hadn’t said whatever she needed to say, but I wasn’t sure it mattered. After seeing the way the guys had responded to me, I was one hundred percent sure that everything was over. I’d lost them.
I sighed and went to the kitchen to pour myself a glass of sweet tea. It didn’t even taste good after what had just happened. “I think I’m going to take a shower.”
“Yeah, yeah. Do that. This can wait.” She practically ushered me into the bathroom and went right back to pacing.
I took a hot shower and scrubbed myself pink. I took my time, unhurriedly going through the motions while my brain tried to torture me with a constant play by play of the things I’d said to them in the dining room.
When I was dried and dressed, I found Bea in the kitchen, putting brownies in the oven. I frowned and looked around. I hadn’t even known there were ingredients for baking.
“I thought chocolate would help.” She set the oven timer and then met my gaze. “I’m just going to say it.”
“Okay.”
“Like ripping off a bandaid.” She started stretching for some reason. “Here I go.”
“Anytime is good for me.”
“Just going to give you bad news and that’s okay. It’s okay.” She shook out her hands and then blurted it all out. “They never wanted kids. I’d always thought they hated kids. They were giant man whores, living like Peter Pan Syndrome is a cute condition, and then Don died. He wrote into his will that they would get nothing if they didn’t each have a kid within five years. They couldn’t get out of it. They didn’t want to lose their family home, so they figured out that a surrogate would work. I overhear things all the time, you know, and I heard them losing their minds about being forced to have kids. They tried everything to get out of it.”
I sat down heavily on a stool. Her words were jumbled in my head and when I started to unjumble them, I shook my head, because that couldn’t be right. “No, they told me they wanted to start their families now. They said that losing their father had really made them see that life was short.”
“They hated Don. They probably would’ve loved it if he’d died a lot earlier on.” She watched my face and winced. “I’m sorry. I didn’t know how to say anything and then it seemed like they were changing for you. They seemed softer. I thought they’d see the light and be happy. But after this, I couldn’t hold it in. They’re punishing you for lying, but they lied too. And their lie leaves three kids in a world they weren’t really wanted in.”
I felt my body burn hotter and tingles break out everywhere. I’d just professed my love to them and had them ignore me, all the while they were lying about wanting a family. They were having kids as a currency to get what they wanted. I wasn’t giving them blue blood kids, but they weren’t giving the kids a real family, so what did it matter?
“Memphis?”
I stood up and jabbed my finger in the direction of the house. “I’m going over there and I’m going to show them what it looks like when you piss a southern woman off.”
“Should I come?”
I looked at the brownies and knew I’d want them later. “Would you be willing to make sure the brownies don’t burn?”
She let out a giant sigh. “Thank God. I’d fight them for you, but I’d really love to keep my job.”
I all but ran to get back to their house. I could feel my blood rushing and I felt like breaking something. Maybe a whole man. Or three.
Letting myself into the house again, I stomped to and fro until I found them in the living room. I gagged at the smell of liquor and vomit that hit me as soon as I crossed the threshold. Once again, I’d managed to work up a good rage and once again, I had to put a cork in it. Strewn out in front of me, looking like a bunch of drunk coeds, the guys were clearly drunker than a skunk and at least one of them had already thrown up.
“What the actual hell is wrong with y’all? How did you manage all of this in the little bit of time I was gone?” I tapped Remy’s prone body with my foot and nearly screamed when he rolled onto his back and stared up at me through bloodshot eyes. “Jesus, Remington. What is wrong with you?”
