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“I know. I’ll make it up to you when I see you. I promise,” he said, his voice smooth as silk.
I nodded and he gave me one of his gorgeous smiles at the camera. “Smile for me.” I beamed.
“Lovely. Good night, Lily.”
“Good night, Jonas.” I turned off the program and my laptop. What was I doing? How could I do that? It wasn’t me, was it? Something about Jonas Crane’s attention and demand had taken a hold of me. I was already seeking to please him. I was already looking forward to the next time I would see him.
Seducing me during our initial dinner had been easy. He was captivating and engaging. His beauty and charm, as well as the easiness of our conversation, had hooked me. But then he asked me to be his companion, and I had agreed to try. A chance to go out and have sex with a gorgeous man seemed easy enough. But what I didn’t know was that his companionship came with his apt attention to everything that I was and wanted to be. Indeed, the more I played over in my mind the precursor “his” to his companionship, the more pang I felt in my heart. And in there lurked the danger. I was and wanted to be his, but Jonas wasn’t mine.
Jonas couldn’t be accused of being passive when it came to me and our companionship. He had proven himself to be attentive in and out of bed, to the degree of overwhelming. Somehow, in only a short amount of time, he had established himself in all aspects of my life. His time, attention, sexual intimacy, and care, just not his commitment. I wasn’t allowed to claim or keep him. Eventually, there was going to be an end.So I just need to be careful. Too early to worry anyway.
I walked out of my bedroom and into the bathroom, where I turned the shower on cold and cleaned myself. I brushed my teeth and moisturized my face. Drying off, I returned to my room and put my phone and laptop away, collapsing on the bed. After a while, I finally fell asleep.
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
‡
The weekend flewby and so did the week. After Gregor’s conference, Arch was inundated by submissions and press attention. Gregor was almost back to himself, though he still kept a professional distance. Before I knew it, Thursday rolled around and I was checking my email every few minutes to find out when Jonas would be returning to New York. On my fifth pass through my inbox, I found a letter from Ms. Hilda Parker. She was managing the Salomé’s Love Legacy Art Week this year.
Dear Lily,
Everyone is very excited about the Salomé’ Love Legacy.
Thank you for organizing the letters and sending them to the previous year’s sponsors.
On a sad note, some have come back and said that due to financial cuts, they won’t be able to contribute. We still have another six months, so perhaps it will pick up. Any ideas, please let me know.
Thank you so much,
Ms. Parker,
Marymount Elementary
I sulked. What was I going to do now? I knew I wouldn’t be able to afford to sponsor the program on my own. I bit my lip and quickly forwarded her letter to the Dean of Students at Boston University to see if she would be willing to get the students involved in a phone campaign this year. I also forwarded it to Mary to ask if she knew someone at Boston Conservatory that may be able to connect with Ms. Parker to help out. I wasn’t ready to let it go, and the only way I knew to cover the cost was to get the promotion from Arch. That involved Jonas.
Jonas Crane. He was becoming an obsession. My mind constantly replaying my time with him. Longing to see and feel him again. Constantly checking my phone and email, for anything to assure me that he was thinking about me and wanted to be with me. I knew my thoughts were dangerous, as he was quite clear in his expectation of me. He wanted me on his terms as his companion available to do and go wherever he wanted when he came back to New York City.
My phone beeped. I looked down and groaned as I realized it was a text from Declan.
How about Bryant Park Grill for lunch?
My stomach churned. I had agreed to meet him for lunch on Thursday, but everything inside me said to not go. However, I reminded myself that he had photos and video of my parents. The photos I was convinced were ruined in the accident, but he said he had them. I needed to be his “good girl” in order for him to give them to me.
How about Sergio’s? I need to be back at 1:00 on the dot.
He replied.Yeah. Okay. See you at 12:00. Can’t wait.
I narrowed my eyes, but turned on my computer. I didn’t like Declan treating this like a date, but I didn’t mention it because I wasn’t sure of his response. My mind chimed in,if you’re not sure, you shouldn’t go.But there was no way I would cancel. He had remembered the years I looked for them and was thoughtful enough to bring them to me.Maybe we can be friends. Like Jonas and Dani.
I stood up and walked over to Gregor’s office and peered in. He was bent over typing at his computer. “Hey.”
“Hello, Lily. I’m on with Brodsky in a few minutes,” Gregor said without stopping. “Is there something you need help with?”
I chewed my lip “No. I have… Well, Declan found some photos and videos and I was going to go to get them from him at noon, unless you need me?”
His head shook as he stayed on task. “No. I won’t. Thank you.”
I folded my arms. “Gregor, come on. Let it go.” I started singing the chorus from the movie Frozen. His shoulders shook a little, which let me know he was amused; however, he still wouldn’t turn around.
