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I did like it.Paul holding me made me feel cherished, and I needed that reassurance. It was against everything a woman was supposed to want these days. Sure, a part of me wanted to take on the world with my designs and become a great success in my own right. But there was still a private part that Paul understood, and I was beginning to understand it, too. That part wanted to feel delicate, treasured, and reassured. Paul needed to feel powerful, and I needed to feel protected—that was our dynamic. We both gave and took from each other. “I’d stay here all day, if you’d let me.”
“I bet you would. I can’t believe what a brat you’ve become.” There was amusement in his voice, but I knew he meant it.
“I thought you told me brats have more fun.”
“I believe what I said wasIhave more fun with brats.”
“Well, if I’m a brat, you are one, too. You got everything you wanted.”
“Not everything, but I will.” He pressed the intercom button. “We’re ready to go to the Hudson. Thanks, Laurence.”
Paul was always confident. Everything he said would happen, did. I was back in New York City and back with him. It took losing complete control, baring myself—body and soul—for Paul to let me in.
I don’t even know who I’d bring you to who wouldn’t try to use you as leverage. I haven’t had a friend I could trust for so long or a relationship that’s lasted.
I understood why he built walls of rules and contracts. To keep his heart safe, and those he cared for safe. He was vulnerable now, and I’d become a part of his vulnerability.Paul may not love me, but he cares about me deeply. He needs me.
A quiet calm settled between us as we rode across the JFK bridge back to Manhattan. Paul wanted to wait on announcing our relationship, but in the meantime, we would “date.” When I asked Paul to date, I wasn’t sure what would happen. Did I think he’d see me differently?Or am I getting too far ahead of myself again?I needed a talk with Xander.That conversation will be full of “I told you so’s.”
I hummed Paul McCartney and Wings’“With A Little Luck”—something Paul had played when we arrived in Paris.
He leaned down and kissed my forehead.“You’re so happy but have no idea what you’ve asked for.”
I tensed. “Have you changed your mind about going public and dating me?”
“No, I haven’t, Nadia. My instincts are to keep you safe. I’m proud of how you’ve grown, but I’m worried. I don’t want to steal your success from you.”
I tilted my head back and squinted at him. His eyes were dull and lifeless.A bit overdramatic for him. Jeez. Dating me isn’t torture.“How could you steal success from me? That’s absurd.”
He gave a smile that didn’t reach his eyes. “It happened with Aubrey. No matter how hard she worked, every accomplishment came with my name first. She second-guessed herself and overcompensated trying to convince the world she deserved success. But the world is cruel and heartless; it can never be pleased.”
Some people already think I am Paul’s girlfriend, and I’ve already heard some snide remarks from classmates. However, that was on a smaller scale. Sometimes I forgot Paul was a Crane, an American prince, and famous. His family stayed in the top five on Forbes’ list of wealthiest families. Indeed, there wasn’t a place in the world that didn’t know him. However, I wasn’t afraid of a challenge.
“I’m no stranger to cruelty. I was bullied in school. The professors are brutal in their critiques—”
“What about strangers organizing to bring you down?”
“Strangers kept me down in school. No one wanted to be friends with the weird, slow kid. I was put down every day. I think I can make it—”
“You were angry about Gunnar and my response to him, and I have some control over how he relates to you, but the public is completely different, and I haven’t even talked about enemies—”
“And we’ll handle it together, Paul. We’re not announcing for a while, and we just made up. Let’s enjoy ourselves.”
The car stopped outside the Hudson, and nervousness went through my stomach. Paul usually dropped me off and returned to his life, but I wasn’t ready for him to go away.Could I ask him to stay for a while?
“Nadia, I’m glad you’re back.” Laurence’s greeting broke into my thoughts as he helped me out of the car. No matter what happened, Laurence had seen a lot and never made me feel bad. Still, I couldn’t stop the warmth in my cheeks.Had our sex in the car been loud?
“Hey, Laurence. I missed you, too.”
“I have to take this call,” Paul announced and walked a few feet away from us.
Laurence came close and whispered, “Paul was depressed, and I haven’t seen him that way in a while. Give him a chance, please?”
I nodded, and Paul came back over. His eyes shifted between the two of us.
“I was just telling Nadia how much we missed her,” Laurence said smoothly, and they smiled at each other.
“Yes, we did, and I’ve decided to change plans. I’m working from here. Would you please bring my briefcases inside?” Paul asked him.
