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“Hey, didn’t know you were coming tonight. Mom here?” I ask, looking over his shoulder.
“No, she and Celeste stayed back with the grandkids. They both said their rodeo days are over.” He pats my shoulder, pulling out his wallet. “Drinks are on me.”
“Not necessary, Dad.” I try pushing his wallet away, but he insists.
“You spoken with your siblings yet about things?” he asks as we step aside to wait for our beers.
“Tomorrow, actually.”
He nods, an unreadable look in his eyes. That’s his way of saying something without saying something.
“What?” I ask, reaching for our beers as they’re placed on the bar top.
“Something going on with you two?”
I turn around, looking over my shoulder at Dolly, who’s laughing. She throws her head back, her dark curls bouncing with her shoulders as Decker says something animatedly to her.
“Is that any of your business?” I hang my head almost instantly. “Sorry,” I apologize.
“It’s not my business, but I also don’t want you breaking her heart, son. That young woman has been through enough.” He pats my shoulder again, gently. “I’m gonna go sit with your Uncle Drake over there.” He points to where my uncle is talking to someone. I wave at him before taking my beers and heading up to where Dolly and my siblings are sitting.
“Ranger, this is Kent. Kent, this is my other younger brother, Ranger.” Milly points between me and her boyfriend.
“Pleasure.” He smiles, holding out his hand. I hand a beer to Dolly before wiping it against my thigh and reciprocating.
“Nice to meet you, Kent.” I shake his hand firmly, eyeing him before Decker gives me a thumbs-up out of their vision.
“Thanks for letting me come along tonight. I’ve been pretty anxious about meeting Milly’s brothers.”
“Didn’t know you’d be coming along tonight, Kent.” I smile at him, surprised he isn’t wearing khakis and an oxford shirt.
“Be nice,” Milly says under her breath as she pinches my arm, just like she used to when we were younger and I embarrassed her.
“Kent was just telling us that his great aunt is Jane Frazier from the library. Did you know that? You remember Miss Frazier, right? She was the librarian when we were kids,” Decker says.
“Yeah, I remember. She still there?”
“She is.” He nods. “I came out here a few times growing up, actually. My parents live in Boulder, and my older sister is in Denver—where I grew up and live now, and I have a lot of my extended family throughout the state. So I’m basically a local.” He laughs.
“Nah,” I take a sip of my beer as I take a seat, “Denver ain’t local.”
“What is with you?” Dolly leans over, whispering. “He’s trying. Give him a break.”
“He’s banging my sister, so he doesn’t get a fuckin’ break,” I whisper back. I didn’t mean to say it loud enough for Milly to hear, but she did. “Sorry,” I mutter. I hate that I can feel the frustration building already. The defensiveness I displayed with my dad just a moment ago was the start of it. Well, actually, that’s not true . . . being reminded that I have no business with Dolly was the start of it. I want to throw my arm around her right now and let everyone know we’re together—that I’m in love with her—but the reality is, I’m an asshole and I need to man the fuck up and be honest with her.
I down the rest of my beer. “You want another?” I ask, looking over at Dolly.
“Uh, I’ve had, like, two drinks. Hey, are you okay?” She gently places her hand on my thigh, my eyes looking down to where the warmth of her skin is burning through my jeans.
“Yeah, I’m good.” I stand up, brushing her fingers off me. “Just need another beer.” I walk down the bleachers, but instead of heading to the concession stand, I turn and walk out of the venue into the parking lot. I take in a few deep breaths, looking up at the sky.
I can feel the anger coming back—the guilt and frustration I’ve swallowed down the last few weeks after Dolly and I had our talk in the cabin. I really thought I could just ignore all those feelings, all those thoughts. I thought if I just pushed aside the guilt, it would go away. I kick at the rocks angrily, walking toward my truck. I yank down the bed, sitting on it and letting my head fall forward into my hands. It’s not that I feel sorry for myself; I’m just angry that I want two conflicting things. I want a life here with Dolly, but at the same time, I want a fresh start in Texas, where I can expand my family business and not feel like I’m a piece-of-shit friend who’s secretly been in love with his best friend’s wife.
“Ranger, what’s going on?” I snap my head up to find Dolly walking briskly across the parking lot toward me.
“Nothin’.” I shake my head and note concern furrowing her brow as she approaches me.
“Hey,” she stands between my thighs, her hands resting on them before reaching out to cup my face, “talk to me, baby.”
