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She’d let me wait, thinking she wouldn’t come. Had she really not thought of a single thing to say to me?
I loved how firm her body looked, tight and tense and angry, because I knew how she softened and purred. All she’d been wearing was suits and dresses. The jeans and the leather jacket gave an extra edge to her scorn.
“How about ‘I love you’?”
I wanted to hear her say it. She used to shower me with kisses, giggling as she peppered me with ‘I love you's' until she left for classes.
“Really? And then what? You’ll sing about my pussy for the rest of your life?”
“That was the plan, yeah.” I grinned at her scowl. Or give it all up for her if she asked.
She’d wrung me dry in pursuit of her love, letting my heart be battered to pieces. I still wanted her, but we’d been through so much that we needed to be together, standing with each other, facing in the same direction, not pushing and pulling, fighting and running. I wanted all of her. I wouldn’t settle for anything less.
I grinned, enjoying how my answer made her scowl deepen. “But there’s so many other things you could do to get me going.”
I wanted her closer. A thrill shuddered through me when she stepped forward, crowding me. I thought she would grab me, drag me off, and have her wicked way with me again.
“You’re unbelievable.” Her voice softened, and I caught the give in her eyes.
She might be trying to be angry, but there was too much love in her eyes for me to buy it.
She ran her gaze over me, huddled up in the cold in my little blanket like a child. I couldn’t miss this chance; it might be the only one I’d ever got.
“It’s always been you, Kitty Cat. I meant what I said out there. You’re the one that keeps me going.”
“You’re an idiot.”
All I heard was ‘I love you’.
“I’m the biggest idiot in the world when it comes to you.” I reached forward and took her hands, letting the blanket fall off my shoulders, flinching as the midnight air hit me.
I loved that she still fought me. Even as she let me wrap my icy fingers around hers and step into her warmth, she glared at me like I was a monster for telling her the truth.
“I swear, Cat, I mean it. Since I first laid eyes on you, I’ve been mad about you. There hasn’t been a single day I haven’t thought about you, not once in all these years.” I squeezed her hands. My fingers ached from plucking strings out in the cold, but her touch was enough to soothe them. “I love you.” I wanted her to hear me. Even when I was inside her, telling her over and over again how I adored her, I was sure she was still running away from this. I wanted her to embrace it, to hear me, to accept me. I stared straight into her gorgeous blue eyes. “I love you so much that even being apart these weeks has been torture.”
The techs and staff still running about had paused to watch. It didn’t matter, nothing did when Cat was right here, staring at our clasped hands.
“I don’t want to stop this thing we have going here. I’m sorry I lied. I really am. I’m sorry for all of it, for everything I’ve put you through, but I’ll do anything if it means I can be with you.”
I could have said more. I could have talked for the rest of the night about how much she meant to me, the dreams I had for us, and how I wanted to spend our lives together. I didn’t care if it was in a house in the suburbs or living on our tour bus or settling or travelling or living together or living apart. As long as we loved each other, that was enough.
“You are the worst thing that has ever happened to me.” She pushed out through clenched teeth, her brows pulled tight as she focused on our hands. “I hate everything about you, you know that?” I couldn’t tell who was trembling, our hands gripping each other so tightly. Was it the cold or the pressure of my heart exploding in my chest, pushing the air from my lungs? “I hate that you make me weak, that you make me want you, that you have me under your spell.” Her hardness fell away as she continued, meeting my eyes and glaring, almost daring me to challenge her. I could barely move, too terrified to stop her. “I hate that you’re so beautiful that I want to tear you apart. I hate that you occupy every part of my mind. I hate that I want to spend days exploring every inch of your body.” She sighed in frustration, her warm breath puffing over my frozen face. “And I can’t stand the fact I want you to do the same to me.”
How long had I been waiting for this? Even in the darkest of nights years ago, when I thought I’d never see her again, I dreamt of the moment she would return, telling me how she’d never forgotten me.
“It’s ridiculous. I hate feeling like this. It’s like you’ve stamped yourself on my heart, and I can’t get rid of you.” She sucked in a ragged breath, drawing herself up to her full height, a storm surrounding her as she growled out her final confession. “And I love you. I love you so much. I want to destroy you so I don’t have to feel this… this thing between us.”
After all that, she still looked like she wanted to kill me for forcing the words from her. Standing here in the middle of the night in the harsh cold under the fucking ugly lights, stinking of sweat and nerves with the techs and stagehands staring, everything became gorgeous and magical because she spoke to me like I was the only person in the world.
“I hate it, Max. But I hate it even more when you’re gone.”
I’d sung hundreds of songs trying to tell her how much I loved her, and she left me speechless. I’d been waiting so long for this that I could only lean forward and take her lips, kissing her so gently and passionately I thought I was dissolving, becoming one with her.
My fingers left hers as we opened our arms, pulling each other closer, wrapping around each other. I never wanted to let her go.
“I love you,” I murmured before kissing her again, treasuring her lips, and how perfectly every part of her aligned with every part of me.
We really were made for each other.
