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But the way she was looking at me made me feel like I had paint all over my face.
“What? Why are you looking at me like that? I thought you liked the steak.”
“I did.” She laughed.
“Then what is it?”
She smiled. “Nothing.”
“Nothing, huh? Every time you smile like that and say nothing, we end up having sex.” I couldn’t help but grin, as it was true.
“Well, if you already know what’s up, then why do you still ask?”
“I was just wondering that myself,” I said, pulling her in for a kiss. Damn it, that was all it took for me to get hard. Quickly, I pulled away.
“But that will have to wait.” Her face pouted like that of a child. “I need to check the perimeter. You can come, if you want?”
“I sure do,” she countered and grabbed her shoes.
Things had changed a lot since we were stuck together so I could heal. We lived here quietly, and even in such a short period of time, her presence had changed from a burden to something I fucking enjoyed having around. Every day, we sat and ate together. Sometimes we read books together or played card games on the bed. She wasn't that good at them, but she managed to win a few because I let her. I didn’t have much experience being around other humans, so playing games and sitting outside the cabin in the evening, reading, was so foreign to me. My urge and desire to touch her was pretty much out of control. Which was new to me as well. Men like me would never be husband material, so I saved myself the hassle of spending time with women altogether.But that was pre-Elise.I was officially getting crazier and crazier every day thinking about her. We had sex several times a day, and I loved eating her out. She tasted so damn good.
But every time we came to our senses, I realized how afraid I was of where all this would lead. She was cautious, too, and wouldn't tell me what was on her mind or why her mood changed suddenly in the middle of a conversation. I figured she was worrying about the same things I was.
Us.
Then there was the even bigger worry about how I could protect herandmyself from the CIA. Her husband was a headache too, but honestly, I would just take him out first chance I got. But the fucking CIA was no force to mess with. Not with two lives on the line.
“Andrei? Are we going for a walk or not?” she asked, and I realized I had been lost in my thoughts.
“Yes, let me just get my gun.”
We went for a lot of walks in the woods. Short ones the first few days, but then the usual rounds once I was doing better.
I walked into the bedroom and came back out with my gun. She was standing by the door fixing her dress, and I couldn’t help but stop for a second to watch her.
“What?” she wondered, catching my gaze.
“Nothing.”
We stepped out into the morning air and turned toward the woods. We walked silently for a while, smelling the scents of trees and flowers.
“I wish I could live like this forever,” she suddenly said, blushing. “Maybe a bigger house... with...” She looked at my face, her eyes searching mine.
Please don’t say kids.
Suddenly it hit me. I had always assumed she was on some form of birth control, but we had never really talked about it. But then, she didn’t seem like the sort of woman who would make babies with a monster like me.
“... with more than one dress,” she finally said, giggling. “You should have seen your face.” She grinned a bit longer, then she grew serious. “You won’t have to worry about that.”
“About what?”
“You kidding?” She wrinkled her forehead. “We’ve been at it day and night. You do know about the bees and the flowers, don’t you?”
“Yes, but you don’t strike me as a woman who would want to have a kid from a monster like me.”
“Don’t say that. That’s not it. I… I can’t have kids. I always knew I wanted to be a mother. Even as a child. But life is a bitch. We already know that.”
“I’m… so sorry.” And I truly was. I had no doubt she would have been an amazing mother. One of those who would die for her kids no questions asked. Life was an asshole indeed.
