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“How invested are you?” I asked.
“See, I’ve been trying my hardest not to. Because I learned a long time ago that girls like me don’t get to keep guys like you.”
“Guys like me?”
“Guys who look like you, who fuck like you, who are smart and funny and who also take care of their girl. You don’t want a girl who’s been… around.”
“How do you know what I want?”
“I’m assuming from what I’ve seen that you’re a no bullshit guy who won’t want the hassles that come with a girl who other guys think is beneath the ‘ol lady status.”
“Have you taken a look in the mirror lately?” I asked. “Because a girl that looks like you, fucks like you, sings like you? Someone who isn’t plastic and manipulating and only out for herself? You’re a fuckin’ catch, Gigi.”
“Most people think I’ve already been caught too many times, that I’m not girlfriend material.”
“I’m not most people.”
“Because of your mom?”
“I grew up around beautiful women, plenty who were tough as nails but some who were broken, who didn’t know their worth because they were treated like all they were was what was between their legs. I knew ‘em, knew what was underneath. Know how it can be hard to shake off the stigma of being an exotic dancer, for example, because people think they know what you’re about. They only know that you dance for a living, they don’t know what’s underneath. I know some of the club hang-around girls are sluts. But a lot of bikers are sluts, too. Some of them are lonely. Some are just girls out to have a good time. Nothin’ wrong with that. That’s what the brotherhood is about – living life according to your own rules. Double-standard to think we should live that way but the women in our lives can’t.”
“But what about what the brothers’ll think of you having me around? They’re not gonna hassle you? Because honestly, I think Spencer was willing to give me a shot except that he knew the guys would ride him for it.”
“Don’t give a fuck if people think they can ride me for it.”
“I won’t fit in with the girlfriends. They’re gonna hate me. Be convinced they can’t trust me.”
“Jojo’s moved back. You’re tight with her, right?”
“I wouldn’t say tight, but I like her. She’s always cool to me.”
“Pippa was chill about you when she and I talked that first morning.”
She flinched.
“You still crushin’ on Spence?” I asked.
“No, it’s not that. That’s long over. I haven’t had anything deep with anyone, other than Edge and that isn’t what people think. We carried on a bit of a charade so people would leave me be and so I could stay there whenever I needed to. I just… I don’t know if I’ll fit with everyone and that might make your life hard.”
“Try. You’ve got me. You don’t need to make best friends with everyone, but I want you on my bike during rallies. I want you at the family parties with the club. And I want it known that you’re mine. And I want you safe, which means you’re at the clubhouse with me for now.”
“What if it doesn’t work?”
“If it doesn’t work, it doesn’t work. We’re giving it a shot.”
“It’ll hurt if it falls apart. If you find you can’t get past me not fitting in with the rest of the club.”
“What if it doesn’t fall apart? What if it works and you get everything you wanted?”
She bit her lip.
“You think it won’t hurt if you don’t try? You think you won’t think back on what we’ve had so far and regret not givin’ it a shot? Seeing if the club really could be the family you wanted for yourself? Yeah, my club comes with me. You’re so sure you won’t fit in, but have you given it a try as my girl? With me at your back?”
“You make too much sense.”
Finally, I suggested, “Tell you what, I could drop you at my mother’s for a couple days. Give you time to get your head together. You do that, get a breather feelin’ safe and I’ll feel better knowin’ Arch has your back. Then, couple days, you come to the clubhouse.”
She lost her defeated body language and nodded. “Your mother would be okay with that?”
“She’d jump at that chance. Just a couple days. I want you there this weekend.”
She knew about the fundraiser coming, how it’d be good for the club. And I knew a couple days under Fernanda’s influence might help her, too.
“Okay,” she relented.
I lifted my phone. “Start tidying. Pack. Okay?”
“Thanks, Jesse.” She kissed my mouth before she rushed to the bedroom.
I headed outside for a smoke and to make that plan.
***
When I pulled away from Arch and my mother’s, I got waves from Arch, Gigi, and Arch’s three girls who were there, who took to Gigi like forest critters took to Snow White.
