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ARIA: Um. Yeah. Maybe the sailing trip will even be helpful.
MOM: Your father and I are looking forward to it. You know, we like Ben, and we can’t wait to have him in the family.
Aria rolled her eyes and shoved her phone back into her pocket. Outside the window, a very soft breeze shimmered through the moss along the trees. As she sat, she tried to convince herself to walk back to her apartment, make herself a pitcher of very cold lemonade, and brainstorm. But before she could stand up, she heard footsteps down the hallway, followed by the gritty, deep, and rather wonderful voice of Professor Judah Heskew— her favorite teacher.
“Is that Aria?”
Aria turned and smiled up at him. As she did, she realized it was the first natural smile she’d given anyone in quite a while— perhaps since the last time she’d seen him. He was in his early fifties, with dark gray hair that curled around his ears, big honest eyes, and a thick beard that he often said was a prerequisite to being a professor. “I promise, Aria. They demand it of you the minute you graduate with a Ph.D.”
“Hi, Professor.” Aria stood. “Pretty cold out, isn’t it?”
Judah laughed. “Are you hiding out in here?”
“Something like that.” Aria waved her sketchbook. “I’m brainstorming for next year.”
“Your final year,” Judah said. “I hope you’re not too nervous. I know sometimes seniors can get in their own way.”
Aria shrugged. “I always get in my way.”
Judah chuckled again and beckoned for her to follow him. “Don’t tell anyone, but I keep a secret stash of ice cream here in the building.”
Judah’s office was comfortable and airy, with big windows opening onto the park between historical buildings. Aria sat with a store-bought chocolate-chip ice cream cone and licked it languidly as Judah nibbled at an ice cream sandwich.
“I always feel like a kid when I eat these,” Aria said. “And I always end up with a ton of chocolate on my face.”
“That’s part of the experience.”
Aria nodded, eyeing the art along Judah’s walls. For years, Judah had worked as a professional architect, and photographs of his rooms and buildings hung to show off his tremendous intellect and artistry. Once, Aria had asked Judah why he wanted to be a professor so badly, and he’d responded,“It’s hard to work with other people. Sometimes, you’ll agree with the wife on something the husband undermines because it’s too expensive. People accuse you of trying to rob them when you’re just trying to make art.”Judah had followed this up by saying that Aria shouldn’t think of this now— that, after graduation, her career as an architect could go several different directions. “But being a professor works well for me. I’m grateful I made this choice,” he’d finished.
For an hour or maybe two, Aria and Judah ate one ice cream and then another and chatted about their summers, architecture, and the next semester. Judah seemed unbothered by Aria’s decision to go on a sailing expedition with her family, including “that young man you’re engaged to,” which he always said with a knowing smile.
“Judah? Do you like being married?” Aria asked this absently, her eyes toward the window.
Judah pulled several strands of hair behind his ear and considered her question. “A great peace comes over you when you decide to settle down with someone. But it has to be with the right person.”
“And your wife is the right person?”
Judah looked pained for a moment. “I don’t know if anyone can honestly answer that question.”
Aria's stomach flipped over.
“Are you asking this because you don’t know if Ben is the right guy for you?” Judah asked, tilting his head.
“I don’t know. I wish someone could just tell me if it was the right thing to do,” Aria breathed.
“Why did you say yes?”
“I guess I thought I could still be an architect and a woman after my own heart while still maintaining some kind of relationship with my family,” Aria explained, her cheeks becoming warm. “I know how much they love Ben. I know how much they want me to be a ‘proper Baldwin.’”
Judah leaned back in his chair. “I’m surprised you still feel like that.”
“Me too,” Aria admitted. “I feel sort of ashamed about it.”
“It’s only natural to want to uphold some kind of love toward your family, even when you don’t agree with them. But you cannot marry someone to appease your parents. It’s a lifelong commitment.” He leaned across his desk, his eyes fiery. “When you applied to this school, you did it without telling anyone what you were doing, without asking permission. And it sounds like you’re asking my permission to break up with this boy. Don’t do that, Aria. Don’t belittle your emotions like that.”
Not long afterward, Aria left Judah’s office with renewed confidence and walked sullenly down the hallway, knowing it was nearly time to do what her soul demanded of her— to call it off with Ben. But as she passed by one of the libraries in the old building, she heard a number of people speaking, their laughter echoing. She paused, listening intently as someone she realized was her co-student, Julia, said, “I don’t know what you thought of Aria’s final project last semester, but it looked like a mess to me.”
“Idealistic baloney,” a student named Nate coughed.
