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Against his lips, I say, “It’ll hurt.” I kiss him more, not getting enough of his lips. When I’ve had my fill, I move back again. “My fingers aren’t small and neither is my dick. Do you want to wait until tomorrow? I can get you some toys to help you prep or—”
Abel cuts me off with a languid kiss that makes me stop thinking. His hands frame my face and I jolt at the feeling of his hand on the rough skin of my facial scars. “No waiting,” he mutters when he pulls back. “I want you. Now. I can take the pain. You’ll make me feel good.”
I love the faith he has in me, but I’ve never been with a virgin. Unlike most men, it’s never been my fantasy to be someone’s first. It’s a lot of pressure. I will be the standard of sex for Abel. If he goes and finds another, he’ll compare us. It’s inevitable, both him finding someone else and comparing.
But it would kill me to tell him no. I can’t turn him away. Not just because of the storm, which hasn’t abated. I’ve wanted no one as much as I want this beautiful boy laid out under me. I wish I could see him when I take him for the first, and maybe only, time. But I can’t. No repeats of the past. “Yeah, baby,” I say roughly. “I will.”
Not making him wait any longer, I give him a quick peck, then move to my nightstand to fish out my lube. Though I haven’t had sex in a while, I need it to jerk off. That was before Abel came and kept my balls empty with his unbelievable mouth.
I put the lube down on the pillow beside Abel, then I peel his clothes from his body, tossing them to the floor. I run my hand over him and feel his lace-covered cock, which makes him twitch and groan.
The beast in me roars and I grab the sides of those panties and tear them from his body. Then I drop down and take his mouth roughly, dragging a hand behind his head and tangling it into his curls, pulling him closer to me. Taking his dick in my hand—a dick that’s bigger than I would imagine with him being so short—I jerk him just as roughly as my kiss.
Abel pulls his mouth away so he can moan and kiss my face. “That feels so good, Sav.” He kisses me more while I concentrate on making him feel good with my hand. “I’ve never … oh God, I’ve never felt this before.”
I slow down and lay him back on the bed. “No one has touched you like this?”
“No. Just you.” Again, the beast that I keep locked up fights to get out and ravage Abel. To make his body feel so good that he’ll want no one but me. Ever.
But I force myself to do right by him and let go of his dick reluctantly, reaching for the lube to put some on three of my fingers. It’s unfortunate Abel picked me to be his first. There’s nothing short or slim about my dick. It’s long and thick, just like the rest of me. This will be the work in my self-control to penetrate him and let him get used to me while I’m buried in his body.
Before I can add the lube, I think and curse myself. “I don’t have a condom. I was tested three months ago, before you came to me. My results were negative if you want to see them. I understand if you don’t want to do it without protection.” I mean it. I would never assume he wanted me raw. That’s a level of trust I have to build up to. I want to give him the option, though. If he doesn’t, I’ll get him off another way. It’s been a while, but if he’s almost coming apart from a hand job, I can only imagine how he would feel with my mouth on him.
“I have condoms,” Abel murmurs. “I guess I was hopeful.” If the lights were on, I know I’d see the blush on his cheeks. I almost turn them on so I can.
“Want me to go get them?”
“Please. They’re in my black bag in the closet. Front pocket.” Though he can’t see me, I nod and hop off the bed. I take a step, then turn around and pull the blanket over Abel and tuck him in, giving him some protection from the storm while I’m gone. He sighs and I hurry out. There hasn’t been any thunder, but the lightning still pulses, so I don’t want to leave him alone for too long.
Thankfully, his bag is right by his closet door. Reaching inside quickly, I find the three pack box of condoms. They’re the brand I use—an extremely lucky guess on Abel’s part. Grabbing them, I rush back to the room. Thunder cracks as I open the door and I hurry to Abel to feel him trembling. Bringing my mouth to his, I kiss him deeply until he stops shaking.
“Better?” I ask when he exhales against my lips and moves away.
“Better. Did you find them?”
“I did.” I slide off my pajama pants, pull the blankets back, and slide back between his legs. His cock, which got soft with the thunder, plumps up against mine. Putting a hand to his face and stroking his cheek, I wonder how I got so lucky. “God, Abel. I want you so bad.” I say softly, letting him know how I feel for probably the first time.
He arches under me, running his hand up and down my arms. “I want you too. I wish I could see you,” he grumbles in frustration, then reaches to the nightstand as if to turn on the bedside lamp.
“No lights!” I growl, and feel Abel jump violently under me. Bending down to capture his mouth, I give him my tongue and my apology. When I pull away, I frame his face with my hands, freely looking down at him through the pitch blackness. “No lights, please. I … no lights,” I beg, not something I usually do. But I want him to want me. He won’t want me if he has to look at my scars while I’m inside him. That’s definitely not a way to get in the mood.
I feel him nod. “Anything you want, Sav,” he responds after a few seconds. I don’t think I’ll ever get enough of that.Sav.
Feeling around and fumbling to find the lube, I sit back on my heels and slick up my fingers. Abel takes a deep breath and blows it out roughly. “I’ll be gentle, I promise, but I can’t take away all the pain. Pull your legs back for me.”
My hand searches for him and I feel his legs are where I need them to be, which will make it easier for me to prep him. Reaching forward with my hand without the lube, I find his leg and slide my hand along until I reach his sac. I fondle it, loving how the heavy weights feel in my hand. Abel rolls his hips, the greedy little thing. I take my other hand and find his puckered opening, which is as smooth as the rest of him. No pubes in sight. I should have figured he would manscape. He takes great care of himself. The most I do is trim.
As gently as I can, I push a finger into him and pause. Abel sucks in a breath and blows it out quickly. I take that as a cue to keep going and I thrust in and out slowly. Swallowing roughly, I revel in the feel of him. He’s so tight and hot here. I can’t wait to be inside him, though it’ll take a while. He has to be as stretched as possible, so this can be good for him.
“Can you take another?” I ask him after his breathing gets softer, and he makes tiny mewling sounds.
“Yes. I can take it,” he whispers.
I ease in a second slick finger, sliding it in and out. I listen to his uneven breathing and feel him tense under me. I remove my hand from my sac, lie on my belly, and kiss his thigh. “Relax for me, baby. I won’t hurt you.”
Abel takes a deep breath. “Can you … suck me?” I smile in the dark, loving the shy way he asks for what he wants. Instead of answering him in words, I pull his hard, throbbing cock between my lips. When I suck him down, I shove both fingers in to the hilt. “Oh, fuck,” he whimpers on a shudder.
His precome tastes so good. He leaks so much, every bob on his dick releases more into me and I gladly gulp it down. My fingers move slowly in and out, just like my mouth on his dick. I hollow my cheeks and suck him deep, wetting him up with my spit. “Sav, Sav. Oh, please. Make me come, please?”
