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“Because if I come back over there, I’ll have you on your back within two heartbeats, Grace. My hands will be on your skin, my tongue buried inside you, and my teeth…” I shook my head.
She tugged that kissable lower lip between her teeth. “Maybe I’d be okay with that.”
Of course she would. Because she wanted to experience everything, and she didn’t know that she really was flirting with death at this moment. I prided myself on my control, and yet I wasn’t sure I’d be able to hold back if she so much astouchedme. The very thing that had first attracted me to her—her passion, her yearning for life—had a very real chance of getting her killed if I didn’t get a damned grip.
“But I wouldn't be.”
She stiffened.
“There is something about you that completely steals every ounce of control I can muster, Grace. And I don’t want to…”hurt you. “Look, there’s just a lot you don’t know about me. So I’m asking that you walk right past me, go inside your house, lock the doors, and go to sleep before you learn things you’re not ready for.”
She cocked an eyebrow. “I think I should be able to decide what I’m ready for.”
Modern females were going to be the death of me. At least this one was.
“Right. But I get to decide what I’m ready to tell you.” I worked at keeping my fangs hidden. “So have some fucking mercy on me and go inside.”
She studied me for a second, making her choice. Then she turned and grabbed her book. “Fine,” she said as she walked to the door. “But I’m going to fantasize about you tonight and there’s nothing you can do about it.” She yanked the door open and then slammed it behind her.
I sat guard on her porch for the rest of the night, replaying every second of that kiss.
It had been too fast, over too quickly, and I knew if I opened that door, she’d welcome me with open arms and that reckless spirit.
But it wasn’t my lack of control that horrified me as much as the low, insistent voice of my instincts that had one single word on fucking repeat.
Mine.
6
GRACE
MY PULSE RACED AS I STRADDLED AJAX.
He was so hard—muscles and a considerable length I could feel every time I rocked against him.
And warm. God, he was so warm as he stroked my mouth with his tongue, urging mine in a dance that stole my breath and made me tremble against him. His hair was silky between my fingers and I relished the touch as I tugged him closer to me.
This was kissing.
This was something worth living for…
I blew out a breath, shaking myself from thoughts of last night. It’d been twenty-four hours, and I’d already replayed that kiss in my mind a hundred times.
I’d been kissed before, but what Ajax had done had been so much more.
He’d consumed me. Woken me up. Made my body feel like a live wire with just the power of his mouth. How was that even possible?
Determined to think about literally anything else, I climbed into my bed, dragging my laptop along with me. The sun was setting outside my windows, the last rays of golden light transitioning to shades of indigo and violet.
I opened my email, going over the last details of my living will with the lawyer setting everything up for me. He just needed one last signature and had sent over a digital form to sign. I clicked it, scanning the details we’d been over a dozen times in the last week.
Anything I had left over in my savings account would go to Maria and her foster care estate, plus my car, which wasn’t really worth much now, but maybe she could give it to one of the teenagers currently under her care.
I signed the document and double-checked the confirmation email stating I had. A little weight lifted off my shoulders knowing I’d done everything in my power to make things as easy as possible when I passed. Hell, I’d even given specific instructions for Maria to utilize anything she could from my apartment for the kids in her care.
Now all I had left to do was…whatever I wanted.
I clicked over to my bank website, checking my balances. Running the figures in my head, I had plenty to live off of for the next three months, even enough for a trip overseas, if I wanted.
