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It killed me to recognize just how much pain I’d caused.
ELEVEN
Kiera
None of this was getting any easier.
I’d already thought I’d experienced the worst days of my life in the ones that immediately followed the discussion Johnny and I had had roughly six months ago about getting divorced.
Sleeping alone for the first time had been awful.
Not having anyone to go to, so I could share the good news about a party or event I was planning, sucked.
And the worst of all was not having any of those quiet nights together cuddling on the couch or making love to one another.
But if those experiences were bad, they paled in comparison to what this trip was turning out to be.
I guess, on some level, it had been just a touch easier when we were home, because we hadn’t needed to be in such close proximity to one another. Now, we’d been around each other for just over twenty-four hours, and I wasn’t sure I’d make it through the rest of the week with him.
We’d just finished up our day on the beach with our friends, and everyone had decided to head back to the villas for a bit to get ready for dinner tonight. Of course, there was plenty of time before dinner, and if things had been different between Johnny and me, we’d have likely used that time giving in to the sexual tension between us.
We didn’t have that anymore.
So, we’d be heading back, and I’d likely stick to my bedroom until it was time to leave. I didn’t trust myself not to lose it completely after the stunt he pulled today with the food.
Truthfully, it surprised me that Johnny had even taken notice of the weight loss. I hadn’t been trying to lose any, but my appetite hadn’t been great for months now.
As soon as we got back to the room, I was going to make sure he knew that I didn’t appreciate what he’d said or done. Unfortunately, as we made our way back, most of the journey was done with our friends.
Zac and Talia were the first to split off, followed a few seconds later by Gage and Saylor. We continued walking along the grounds of the resort until Simon and Margot peeled off to head to their villa. As it turned out, Thea and Colt were staying in the villa two doors down from the one Johnny and I were in.
“Hey, Kiera, would you mind stopping for a minute, so I can get your advice on my dress and shoes for tonight? I’ve been struggling to make a decision,” Thea said.
Maybe this would be good. I needed a bit of separation from Johnny. Of course, I didn’t know how he was going to react, but I hoped he wasn’t going to wait around for me.
When I looked at him, I answered Thea, “Sure. I’d be happy to help.”
“Thank you.”
When we made it to their villa, Johnny said, “I’m going to head back to ours. I’ll see you when you’re done.”
Unwilling to cause a scene, I replied, “I’ll be there shortly.”
With that, Johnny looked at Colt and said, “See you in a couple hours.”
“Yeah, definitely. Later, man.”
Johnny took off, and I followed Thea and Colt into their villa. It didn’t take me more than five minutes to help Thea decide on her dress and shoes. I didn’t stick around, knowing they probably wanted some time alone and that I also needed to take advantage of some of the time I had to confront Johnny.
But when I got back to the villa, I got a bit more than I bargained for.
Where I’d been staying in the bedroom that had a bathroom that was accessible only by going through the bedroom, Johnny was staying in the bedroom on the opposite side of the villa that had a bathroom with two entrances. One of those entrances faced the common area.
Since Johnny wasn’t in the shared kitchen or the living room, I assumed he had to be in his bedroom. So, I made my approach, prepared to knock, when it happened.
I heard him.
Grunting.
