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Suddenly, arms wrapped around me. “Breathe, Ace. Slow, deep breaths.”
I closed my eyes and followed the instruction. Andrew’s scent wafted over me in a haze of comfort. Without thinking, I leaned into him. He gave me a light squeeze before steadying me on my feet. I turned around to face him.
“Thank you for being here.” I looked down at my hands, watching them squeeze each other. “I know you don’t agree with me marrying Michael.”
He tilted my chin up and held it firmly in his grasp so that I couldn’t look away. “Ace,” he murmured. “Of course I’m here. I’ll be here no matter what.”
We smiled at each other, the joyless smile of two people who refused to say the truth aloud. Andrew may be reliable in the sense that he was always my constant, but I was always, reliably, a coward.
Michael arrived shortly after us, looking distinguished in his navy-blue suit and bow tie. He opted for his glasses instead of his contacts and had gathered his shoulder-length hair into a neat bun. His dimples, like mischievous children, tugged on the corners of his mouth as he smiled at me.
“Babe,” he said. “You look beautiful.”
I smiled. Now that he was here, in front of me, it was hard to keep hold of my doubts. Michael is probably just as freaked out as you are, I tried to assure myself. That’s probably why he’s been so overbearing and distant. Everything will be fine. This is the happily-ever-after you’ve dreamed of.
“Thanks, so do you.” We smiled at the ongoing joke. “You ready to do this thing?”
“Of course.” His hazel eyes twinkled. “I’ve been ready to marry you for a long time now.”
“A year is a long time?” I smiled. “Then forever’s gonna feel like—”
“—an eternity?” he finished. We laughed.
He held out his arm, and I linked mine through it.
“Last chance to back out,” I murmured. He patted my hand and led me toward the main room.
“Alicia, you’re my forever,” he said. “I can’t wait to marry you.”
The actual paperwork process took about fifteen minutes. However, as these things go when facing the thing one dreads the most, time seemed to crawl, stutter, and stop completely. Every minute spent waiting in line felt like an hour; getting in front of the Justice of the Peace took days.
Finally, once we completed the paperwork, we were brought to a sad little room located off the main hallway. The off-white walls were dingy and a little gray; the wooden lectern stood at an angle. The carpet looked like the carpet that time forgot, threadbare at best, nonexistent in patches.
Catalina surveyed the room with obvious disdain. “What in the name of all Fuckery is this,” she muttered. “You’d think they would spruce this up a little, instead of letting it look like the place where all happiness goes to die. Wow, this a depressing room.”
Naturally, Andrew didn’t say anything. But his eyes blazed when he caught mine. Are you sure? he seemed to ask. Is this really what you want?
I hoped my returning look said, Of course. Instead, I feared it asked, Why isn’t this you and me?
“We are gathered here today to witness these two young folks, Michael John Smith and Alicia Danielle Jones, join in matrimony as approved by the state of Massachusetts,” the JP intoned. “They have decided not to exchange rings at this time, but would like to say a few words. Who would like to start?”
“I’ll go.” Michael cleared his throat and pulled out a sheet of paper. Beads of sweat immediately popped out on my forehead; fuck me, but I hadn’t thought to write vows for this ceremony.
“Alicia.” Michael paused and gazed at me with adoring, twinkling hazel eyes. “From the moment I saw you with tear-filled eyes in that Korean food restaurant, I knew that we would be together forever.” He smiled. “There was something magical about the way you looked at me, the smile you gave me, and the laugh we shared that day. I knew we couldn’t spend one more moment not knowing each other.”
Though I smiled, I was stuck. How could he find one of my most heartbreaking moments “magical?” I thought. And it was Thai food, not Korean. I’ve never eaten Korean food in my life.
The sense of foreboding that had been building in my stomach grew until it almost consumed me. This marriage, it was all wrong. And it was to the wrong person. But it was already too late. We signed the papers.
I was in it for life.
After the ceremony, Cat didn’t want to stick around. “Now that you’re a married woman, I don’t want to know what kind of business you two will get into,” she said. She tugged on Andrew’s sleeve. “Come on, loverboy, let’s grab coffee before I take you home.”
Andrew met my eyes over Cat’s head. “Congratulations again, truly,” he said. “Call me tomorrow, okay?”
He and I embraced briefly before I pushed him away gently. “Thanks again, Minnie,” I said. “I can never thank you enough.”
“Always.” A flash of sadness crossed his face before his eyes found Cat’s. “Ready?”
“Yup.” She hugged me then Michael. “’Bye, you two.”
“See ya,” we both said.
As Cat and Andrew walked toward Cat’s car, Michael turned to me. “I have a surprise for you.”
My body warmed instantly. “Oh?” I said. “What kind of surprise?”
“If I tell you, it won’t be a surprise, babe.” He laughed. He brought me closer to his body and gave me a less-than-gentle shoulder squeeze. I winced. “Let’s head to my place.”
“Sounds like a plan,” I said.
