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"Eighteen isn’t as old as you think," Amadeo observes sagely. "Many would say he wasn’t fully amanyet."
Romeo slams his palm on his forehead. "Dino flashedme! I was perfectly happy before he did that."
"Happy," Isabella teases, "yet unsatisfied."
Her friend snickers. "You can say that again."
"You know, we had to play sex noises at full volume to convince the neighbors we were still intimate," Isabella gossips in a hushed tone that, thanks to the wind blowing down the mountain, carries her words straight to us.
Her friend’s eyebrows pop up. "For shame!"
"It’s the truth," Isabella laments. "This was before he discovered thelittle blue pill.Now, I didn’t care that he needed it—every man’s equipment fails at a certain age. Yet I suspected there was another reason why we weren’t bumping uglies. It wasn’t long before I realized what it was."
Her friend licks her lower lip. "Romeo wanted his nephew’s horny little friend."
"Damn right," Isabella drawls. "It’s so adorable. Here he is, this grouchy mob boss with billions of dollars who is so insecure about his lovemaking ability—that’s very important to Italian men—that he needs to play tapes of us having sex to prove to the world he’s stillgot it.Inside, his fire only burns for one boy. Dino."
"That’s kinda hot," Isabella’s friend observes.
Romeo’s cheeks are bright pink. "I’m gonna put a hit out on both of you."
Isabella clamps her hand over her mouth. "I didn’t realize you could hear us, dear."
Enzo turns to Isabella. "You two are fast runners—and fun to listen to. Can I accompany you up the mountain?"
"Sure," Isabella’s friend says. "Aww, aren’t you precious."
Isabella pinches Enzo’s cheek. "This is Tommaso’s boy. Truthfully, we thought Tommaso was a power bottom—he was such a sassy little queen growing up. He liked to beat off with Lazaro, too—we assumed Lazaro was turning him out! That was until we found Tommaso’s diary—it was clear they were only experimenting like cousins so often do. Adorable, really."
A vein bulges on Tommaso’s forehead. "Mom!"
Enzo blows Tommaso a kiss. "This is giving me ideas for smoking hot role-play later, Daddy."
Tommaso scowls. "My teenage diary is private."
Isabella jogs up the mountain. "We need to get somewhere where the wind isn’t so strong. I don't want my family hearing me spill their secrets."
Enzo giggles like a schoolgirl as he follows them. "I’m part of the Plastics."
"The huh?" I scratch my brow.
"It’s aMean Girlsreference," Medici drawls. "You’re too young to get it."
"Wow," Ryder says. "I can’t believe Mattie isn’t old enough to knowMean Girls."
"I knowMean Girls," I snap.
"What happens to Regina George at the end of the movie?" Cyan prods.
Uhhhhhm. "She does something very mean." At least I’m a good guesser.
"She gets hit by a bus," Amadeo chastises. "That movie used to be mandatory viewing for every gay boy."
Medici rams his arm around my waist. "I’ll pop yourMean Girlsvirginity," he rasps in my ear. "Maybe on the same night I take your real virginity."
I squirm as my cheeks burn. "I’m ready when you are."
"I lost myMean Girlsvirginity in eighth grade," Amadeo says. "It’s my fondest memory of that stressful year."
