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“I miss you, too, Rob.”
My whole body warms, as if there’s a blanket spread over me. Lovers usually remember their first kiss, but I’ll remember Amber-Rose’s first ‘I miss you’ instead of my failed attempt at our first kiss.
“I’m glad,” I whisper to her.
“I’ll make it up to you,” she says.
“What are you talking about?”
“You know what I’m talking about.”
I lick a lip, hoping she’s talking about that elusive kiss. But I won’t get ahead of myself. “Wyatt will pick you up at five. Is that okay?”
“Sure. What should I wear?”
“You wear whatever you want,” I assure her.
“Shirt and jeans won’t cut it, will they?”
Looking at the time, I realize I may not have given her a chance to think about the all-important what-to-wear. I say, “I’m wearing a shirt and jeans.”
“You want me to go matchy-matchy with you?”
“That wouldn’t be so bad. See you, Amber-Rose. By the way, do you like candy?”
“What?”
“Candy.”
“Um… I love gummies.”
“Alright. Oh, and don’t forget that you still have two of my sweaters.”
Amber-Rose laughs. “I’m keeping them. I’ll see you then.”
I swivel my chair, arms in the air, feeling as lively as if there were little characters singing, like those in theBeat Bugs, Matty’s go-to cartoon when he just wants to chill.
If everything goes well tonight, I will definitely take it to the next level with Amber-Rose. No one else understands me like her, and that drives my desire to have her, more than her physical beauty—although her hotness won’t stop me from pining for her body. Maybe I will be with my special someone soon, and I can show her off to the guy Kylie decided was ‘my competition’ when we try his morning snacks.
14
AMBER
I miss you, Amber-Rose.
Rob’s statement opened me up in more ways than I could count. It was the moment when I finally let the butterflies into my heart—and better still, I set them free.
The thought of Aidan trying to sneak his way back into my life is unexpectedly fueling my anger, not my fear. He’s dead to me, so even if he physically returns, I won’t let him destroy me again. If I lose Rob just because I’m scared of Aidan, I won’t forgive myself.
At hearing Rob’s voice, feeling his sincerity, realization filled me. I don’t have to do this alone. That’s what love is—facing adversity together—and I want to claim that love.
I miss you, too, Rob.
My response was more than an expression of longing. I’ve taken the plunge and dove into the realm of commitment. No more fish in an aquarium, no more let’s-see-what-happens. I already see what’s happening. I see a chance, I see a future. I see a partner who’s willing to walk with me no matter the distance or terrain. It will be my biggest downfall if I witness another woman hugging Rob, crying with him, laughing with him, loving him.
“Jarrod will stay here with you,” I say to Mama. I insist on having my delivery friend watch over her while I’m away in Newport. Jarrod drives his van full-time these days, but he used to be a security guard at our local supermarket. Even though I don’t know how he’d fare against Aidan in a fight, at least he’s capable of getting Mama to safety if something happens.
My mother responds with an annoyed shake of her head.
