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Varin is quiet for a few seconds. “I, too, am happy to see you awake and well,” they say, with more affection than I expected, only to ruin the moment when they continue, “But if you do not stop leaking all over me, I will bite you.”
I relent and hold them in front of my face. They swipe their tiny front paws over my eyes, drying my tears. It’s a touching gesture, but I don’t point it out.
An abrupt thought intrudes on my relief. “If you’re… this,” I say. “Then, does that mean I’m a… vampire?”
Varin rolls their eyes, which is a little unsettling to see on a rabbit. “Are you asking because you crave blood, or because you did not think to check for fangs?”
I pull a face to show my lack of appreciation for their tone. “A simple ‘no’ would have sufficed.” Then I lower them to my lap, furtively running my tongue over the tips of my teeth.
Nothingfeelsdifferent.
I suspect their remarks often hold a bite to them as a defense. In the time they possessed me, I have come to understand that their captivity and the cruelty they suffered has left more scars than the ones left by their chains. There is no telling how long it’s been since they knew kindness, but from now on, I will make sure that is all they know.
Varin bumps my hand with their nose. Their long whiskers brush over my skin, tickling. “You are not a vampire because you did not ask me for anything.”
I frown. “I wanted your power….”
“You asked for my help in exchange for my freedom. And you asked for me to be saved when you could have easily let me die.”
Even the suggestion that it was an option has unease twisting up my insides. Varin may be a demon, but after everything, and I would like to think somewhere along the way, our tenuous trust took hold in a solid foundation.
Help me, and I will free you.Those were my exact words when we struck our bargain. Though I did want the strength and magic they possessed, it never crossed my mind to want it longer than that. Had they realized all of that from the beginning?
“For the most part, you are as you were,” they add.
My jaw goes slack, pulse roaring in my ears, and all previous questions evaporate. “For… the most part?”
“You cannot remain fully human while being bonded to a vampire and a demon.”
The breath halfway down my throat catches, and my mouth goes dry.
CHAPTER THIRTY-NINE
CLARA
It takesa long moment before I remember how to make my lungs work again, to regain the feeling of my tongue and lips, to form the simple question I need the answer to. Even if I’m not entirely sure I’m ready to hear it.
I swallow. Inhale.
When I find my voice again, it is almost entirely all breath. “Then… what am I?”
“A dhampir.” At my bewildered expression, Varin continues, “Technically. Your body will require nothing more than it always has, only now you will have the abilities of a vampire and the power of your demon.”
It takes a few moments for that to sink in and wrap my mind around what it means. I am relieved I have not changed, at least not more than I was ever willing to be, but I’m also curious if there is more to it than that. Perhaps it is just that simple. Either way, that explanation is enough to ease any anxieties.
“Is it terrible being in this form?” I ask quietly, needing to know what Varin went through and that they all right before anything else is said or done.
They tilt their head and use a back foot to scratch at the base of the ear. “It is not so bad.”
“Were you hurt? Why a rabbit?”
Varin eyes me. “It was bearable,” they admit grudgingly, then rush on. “And I amthis, because it was the animal that would serve you… and me, best.”
“Well, I think you are adorable.” I scratch the top of Varin’s head between their ears. They narrow their eyes at me as if insulted, even as they lean into it. Their large round eyes gradually closing.
“I’m sorry you spent so long in chains,” I whisper.
Varin twitches their nose. “I am free now.”
