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One Year Ago
No one wanted me here. Not even my father. Even after he’d almost died of a heart attack, he hadn’t cared that I’d come home. For him. To help Tabitha, who hated me, take care of him. This stupid church that Tabitha loved so much had been brutal to sit through. Hearing the minister preach about how hidden sins would find you out.
Well, I sure as hell hoped not because my father would have another heart attack.
Rolling my eyes, I jerked the door handle on my car harder than necessary, wishing I’d just stayed in Georgia. Perhaps I should just go somewhere else. Find a new place to move to. Start a new life. Tabitha had said Roy and his wife, Anita, were coming for a visit next week. I hadn’t seen him in four years. I’d not gone to his wedding. I refused to be anywhere he was going to be. If he was coming, then I was leaving.
“Excuse me. Trinity, right?”
A male voice startled me, and I spun around to see the man who had spoken before the minister this morning. He looked to be about my age. I wasn’t blind. This man was nice to look at, but he was also a minister of sorts. He was probably coming to save my black soul. I forced a smile and hoped that Tabitha was not out in the parking lot yet, seeing this. I’d come to this church because my father had asked me to. When I was growing up, Tabitha wouldn’t bring me to church with her. She would tell me that those with demons in them weren’t allowed inside the doors. Why my father had thought I should attend church now, I had no idea.
“Yes,” I replied.
His grin spread, making a dimple appear in his left cheek. Okay, so he was handsome and had a dimple. He still loved the Lord and all. Not for me.
“I was, uh, well, I noticed you this morning, and I asked around.”
He looked unsure of himself. That wasn’t expected. I said nothing, curious as to what this was about. He cleared his throat and looked down, then back up at me through his ridiculously long lashes.
“Sorry. I’m not normally so bad at this. You make me nervous,” he explained. “Would you like to go have coffee? Or lunch maybe?”
That was not what I had guessed this was about. I opened my mouth and closed it.
Was this him asking me out? Or had Tabitha told him I was a sinner, bound for eternal damnation, and he was going to try to save my soul?
He ran a hand through his hair and lightly chuckled. “I’m Hayes Kingston. My grandfather is the minister here. I swear I’m not as crazy as it currently seems.”
Wow. The minister’s grandson. I wondered if the man knew his grandson was asking me to coffee. I glanced around the parking lot and immediately saw Tabitha glaring at me. I was speaking to her beloved minister’s grandson. She wasn’t happy about it. I was sure to shame her by simply breathing.
Snapping my gaze back to the man standing in front of me, I smiled brightly. “I’d like that,” I told him.
When he smiled this time, his eyes twinkled with excitement, and I felt a little flutter in my chest. Hayes Kingston was very good-looking, I realized. This would probably be a one-time thing. Tabitha would be sure to bash my name the moment she could. He’d never want to see me again. For now, I’d enjoy a meal with a handsome man who I made nervous. While also making Tabitha furious.
Present Day
Eventually, I was able to get myself together, get up from my pathetic breakdown on the floor, and go to the bathroom. A long, hot shower, cleansing myself from the ugliness that I had accepted and even embraced, helped me clear my head even if it didn’t do anything for the pain that was a part of me. When I exited the bathroom, I saw food had been delivered, but I had no appetite. Forcing myself to eat would only make me sick. I’d tried that in the past.
I curled up on the sofa to watch mindless television shows. Sitcoms where family life was entertaining and all was well at the end of the thirty minutes it took to air. I didn’t know how long I’d sat there, nor did I care what time it was when I heard the footsteps on the stairs once again. The sound caused a sick knot in my stomach, and my eyes shifted to the food I hadn’t touched.
Would I be forced to eat? It wouldn’t be the first time.
Tabitha had caught me sneaking a handful of chips from the pantry once. She then forced me to eat the entire bag and then another until I threw up. Then, she’d given me a spoon and stood over me with a long, thin hickory switch, snapping it across my back until I ate my vomit. To this day, I couldn’t eat plain potato chips.
I fisted my hands in my lap. I wasn’t a child anymore, and physical and emotional pain were things I had learned to survive. Huck was a large man, and as much as I disgusted him, I didn’t believe he would hurt me physically. But then I had been wrong about so many things in life.
My eyes stayed trained on the television show I had been watching. I had no idea what the name of it was, but that didn’t matter. It kept my thoughts preoccupied.
“You didn’t eat.”
His deep voice made me tense.
I would not let this man do any more damage. He had no idea the level of suffering I could endure.
I shrugged. “I didn’t have an appetite.” My eyes never left the television.
Silence. I fought against counting the seconds that ticked by. If the man lunged at me and strangled me to death or began hitting me, then perhaps death was something I could embrace. End this life I’d been given.
“Get up. Get your things.”
