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“If Pierce didn’t have children, would you still be hanging on to this realism?” Lynda squeezes the hand she holding.
I take a large sip of my drink, hoping the tequila will unravel the knot coiling in my stomach. “We’ll never know the answer because, if Maya and Cole weren’t in the picture, I would have returned twelve years ago and begged for my second chance.” My gaze travels out to the back of our land, where everyone seems to be having a great time. The smiles on the kids’ faces are visible from here.
“You know you can have a life, a career, and a family here, too, Darby.” Lynda throws my words back at me. “We’re all rooting for you.”
“I love you for it. But, in reference to Pierce, I’m not sure it’s the life he’s envisioned.”
“Maya and Cole are in an awkward position right now. Children are products of their environment, and we’re all doing our best to guide them in the right direction. It’s impossible to miss the way he feels about you. They witnessed that last night and then again today. It’s going to be okay with them,” Jill tries to assure me.
“I hope so because I hate thinking about Pierce hurting, but I’m being cautious. There’s a lot more at stake for the grown-up versions of Darby and Pierce. His priorities are much different.”
“I have a lot of regrets, Darby, thinking that maybe I could have prevented so much that happened.”
“Jill…”
She holds up a finger, signaling she’s not done. “No, Darby, I could have been there for you in a way you didn’t expect. I know what you went through. My first two pregnancies resulted in miscarriages. One was far enough along to know the baby was a boy. It was a long time ago, but I remember each instance like it was yesterday. The feelings, the failure, the uncontrollable emotions that come like a force of nature. Warren was by my side, but bless his heart, he couldn’t do much to help. I’m not sure the boys even know. We never talked about it once Miller was born.”
That is not at all what I expected her to tell me. “I understand. It’s not exactly a pleasant subject.”
“No, it’s not, but it’s life.”
“I’m sure, once you held him for the first time, the heartache healed—knowing you were able to carry a life inside you and bring him into the world. All the pain and despair would vanish, and you’d know you had this miracle. Or, at least, that’s what I always pictured in my mind.”
Her eyes fill with sympathy, and Lynda scoots a little closer, the mood growing somber.
“I’ll admit that when the nurse placed Miller on my chest, the emotions were overwhelming. It in no way erased the past heartache, but it gave me a new appreciation for what I did have.”
“And then you had Pierce.”
“I did. Healthy pregnancies happen all the time after a miscarriage. You know that, right?” she informs me with hope in her voice.
“Oh, I know, but since I’ve been hung-up in love with the same man for over sixteen years, I never tried again. And, now, I’m not sure I will.”
A heavy silence hangs in the air, and I take another large gulp to shut myself up and stop admitting things that should remain private. If I make eye contact with either of them, we’ll probably all end up in tears.
Runner jogs up the steps, sniffs around my chair, and plops down with a loud doggy huff. His big brown eyes find mine before he closes them to rest.
“I’ll amend that. My baby came in the form of a ball of fur.” I take my hand from Lynda and rustle the top of his head.
Both women stay quiet, but their silence tells all.
Chapter 22
Pierce
“Got some great news.” Miller strides in my office, flipping his phone in his hand.
“Did we win the Johnson bid?”
“Well, yes, but that’s news for the afternoon meeting. This isn’t about business.”
“Hit me with it.”
“Todd came through. The Kiawah Island house is ours in two weeks. Couldn’t get Myrtle Beach, but this is a better deal.”
I toss down my pen and lean back in my chair, trying to recall the details. Todd is an old college friend of Miller’s, who came into some money and started a renovation-flipping business. He decided to keep a few of his properties for rentals. We’ve worked with him several times over the years, which gives us the perfect excuse to leave town for weeks at a time without Connie riding my ass. It’s close enough to come home on the weekends for the kids, yet far enough we could live the life of bachelors without being watched. “Which place?”
“The five-five on the Beachwalk.”
I whistle low. This isn’t our typical two-bedroom condo deal. This is his beachfront mansion that rents for four-thousand a week during the tourist season. We worked on this place years ago during the renovations, and it’s incredible.
