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In rare instances of pure rage as a child because of something her mother had done, Summer had thrown things and liked to see them smash to pieces. He’d often thought it represented her heart shattering in her chest, the shards ripping her soul to pieces.
Jessica didn’t see the damage she inflicted. Charles saw it all too clearly in his granddaughter’s eyes.
He knew it was his fault.
Cody slowly reached out and put his hand over Summer’s. Instantly, she calmed and leaned into him. He leaned into her. It lasted a brief second, just enough time for Charles to see something spark between them before they caught themselves and separated, Summer leaving the paperweight on his desk. Cody took a few steps back and tore his gaze from Summer.
Interesting.
“Summer, give your mother a chance to explain.” Roger held Jessica’s hand and guided her to the sofa. He held her close as tears welled in Jessica’s eyes.
Summer wasn’t swayed by the tears. They came too easily for Jessica.
Charles ignored them as well.
“There’s nothing left to say. She lied. Grandfather lied. My motherforgot Nate the moment she came home and found someone new to shower her with attention.” Summer glared at Jessica. “I can only imagine what you told Thomas. That my father abandoned you, I suppose, would garner you the most sympathy. He played your hero and married you two months after having me, if I remember correctly.”
“It wasn’t like that.” Jessica brushed a tear from her cheek.
“It was exactly like that,” Summer snapped. “At least, you didn’t compound the lie by making me believe he was my father.” Something made her eyes go wide. “Why did you give me his name? You could have kept his identity a secret by naming me Sutherland.”
“I wouldn’t let her.” Charles showed a rare sign of weariness by running his hand across the side of his head through his more gray than brown hair. “I hoped that once you were born, she’d do the right thing and contact your father to let him know he had a daughter. She didn’t. She wouldn’t.”
“No. Of course not.” Summer shook her head. “She had a new love in her life and was wrapped up in wedded bliss, newlywed joy, and all the other lovely new things she likes so much. Until it fades,” she added scathingly.
Jessica fumed. “Summer, I won’t tolerate you speaking to me like this.”
“I don’t care, Mom.”
“He wouldn’t have been able to provide for you,” Jessica tried to defend herself even though it was next to useless. Summer was formidable when she was mad and hurt. “I did the best I could and raised you the way you deserved to be raised... with wealth and privilege.”
Summer rolled her eyes and balled her hands into fists at her sides. “You abandoned me to nannies. I spent more time with them and Grandfather than I did with you.”
“That’s not true.” Jessica pouted.
Charles hated to admit Summer was right.
“When will you learn happiness doesn’t come from money and things?” Summer said.
“He didn’t want you!” Jessica believed her own lies.
“He didn’t even know about me!” Summer turned to Cody. “Do you have any idea what it’s like to be told over and over again that your own father doesn’t want you?”
Charles felt every ounce of Summer’s pain in his own heart.
“I begged, over and over again, for them to just let me see him once. To let me speak to him. If he saw me... If I told him what a good girl I’d been, maybe then he’d change his mind. But the answer was always the same. He didn’t want to see me. He didn’t want to know me. So I begged the man in the moon, I wished on every star, I swore I didn’t need money from the tooth fairy or a present from Santa. All I wanted was one moment with him.” Tears slipped unchecked down her cheeks. “I searched everywhere for a four-leaf clover to bring luck, only to be told by the gardener that there weren’t any weeds on the grounds. I cried to Grandfather and he had a whole field planted for me. But no matter how many I found, all I had was bad luck. He never came for me.”
She stared at Cody, who looked back at her with compassion and sorrow. “I tried to be the best at everything. If I was a good girl, surely he’d want me. I got the best grades. I made the best science projects. No matter what it was, I tried the hardest and did my best. And then one day I wondered, how would he know if I was the best student in my class, or the best at kickball, or made the biggest and best papier-mâché volcano?” She hung her head. “He wouldn’t.” She looked at Cody again. “Because he didn’t want me. He didn’t care. He wasn’t going to show up for the school play or a soccer game. Only one person never missed anything.” She turnedto Charles. “You were pushy and demanding, but always on my side and at everything I did even when Mom was off with whoever she loved more in the moment.”
Her mom gasped. “That’s not fair. I always loved you best.”
“No, it wasn’t fair.” She met Charles’s gaze again. “And neither was you being my everything and lying to my face every time I begged you to find him and make him want me. It wasn’t fair that you kept me from him.”
“No, it wasn’t, Ladybug. I wanted to give you everything, but I didn’t give you that, and I’m sorry for it. I could make excuses, I always do when it comes to your mother, but there isn’t one for what I did. Just know I, too, gave into my selfishness, because I wanted to keep you all to myself, too. I saw in you everything I’d done wrong with your mother and everything I could do right by you. Everything I have will be yours. Everything I’ve become over the last twenty-five years is because you made me a better man.”
Summer’s tears fell in earnest. “All you had to do was tell me the truth.”
“I wanted to so many times. And then you stopped asking and I thought it for the best because your father had moved on and had children of his own.”
