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I told him I love him.
He said the same.
And then...
I put my hand over my belly,convincedthere's something there. It can't happen so soon, of course--there's no way of knowing for weeks. But it feels like I'm pregnant.
I can't explain it.
There's just...a feeling. A sensation that all is right with the world.
I roll to my side and look at Jake's sleeping face--his furrowed brow, his messy dark hair, his tan skin and beard. There's a scar over his left eyebrow, the barest scrape. I've never noticed it before.
I reach out and touch it and he stirs as I lean forward to kiss his forehead. When I pull back, his eyes are open and his lips are curved in a smile.
"Good morning,mon amour."
"Good morning," I whisper back, trying to ignore the fluttering sensation in my stomach as I bury my face in his chest. His arms tighten around me in response, as if he knows exactly what I'm feeling.
"I can't believe it," I say after a moment, my voice muffled by his skin. "I know it's too soon to tell, but I just have this feeling..."
He chuckles softly, and I look up at him to see a teasing glint in his eyes. "Are you saying you're already imagining us with a whole gaggle of kids running around?"
I swat at him playfully, but he just grins and leans down to kiss me. It's slow and tender, a promise of everything to come.
But even as I lose myself in the feel of his lips on mine, I can't help but wonder. What if I really am pregnant? How will that change everything?
"Jake," I say quietly.
"Yeah?"
"Did I ever tell you about my folks?"
He kisses the top of my head and strokes my hair. I should feel perfectly at peace, but I can already feel my anxiety mounting when it comes to what I'm about to tell him.
"I don't think so," he says, his voice rumbling in his chest.
"They got divorced when I was a kid," I tell him. "I was an accident, and I...well, I wasn't loved like a kid should be. My dad always resented my mom and me, and my mom passed years ago. Ever since, the Harts have been the only family I have."
He tilts my chin up to look at him, and I can see the sympathy in his eyes. "Sarah...I had no idea."
I swallow hard. "Yeah. I think that's why I've been so scared to do this with you--because I wanted it on some level, but I've always been afraid I'll turn out just like my parents...and I don't want to ruin things with your family. They've been so kind to me."
Jake's expression softens, and he cups my face in his hands. "You're not your parents, Sarah. You're your own person, and you're not going to ruin anything."
"But what if I am pregnant?" I ask, the anxiety still looming over me.
"Then we'll handle it together," Jake says firmly. "We'll figure it out. And my family will love you no matter what."
I nod slowly, letting his words sink in. He's right--I'm not my parents. And if I do end up pregnant, I'll have Jake by my side.
For the first time in a long time, I allow myself to feel a glimmer of hope. Maybe this is what I've been searching for all along--a real family, built on love and trust.
I lean in for another kiss, feeling the fluttering sensation in my stomach stir once again. This time, though, it's not anxiety. It's excitement, anticipation, the sense that everything's going to be okay because we're in this together.
"I love you," I say softly. "I know we said it last night...but I mean it. I think I've loved you since the day we met."
"I love you too," he says. "Sarah...I didn't say it before, but I thought about you every damn night while I was away. It made the whole adventure feel stale--knowing I could be back here with you instead."
