AllFreeNovel
Share Us
What the fuck was I supposed to say?
How was I meant to comfort her after a bomb dropping like that?
Instead of saying anything, I pulled her into me. She shuffled so her head rested on my shoulder, and I stroked her back. We stayed like that until we both drifted off to sleep.
* * *
The entire room was black when I woke up, stirring from the chill. Alina was still snuggled in close and sleeping peacefully. I held her while toeing the blanket from the bottom of the bed, trying not to wake her.
“Callum?” Her voice was thick with sleep, while her movements were slow with fatigue.
“Yes, baby. I’m still here.”
“I’m tired.”
“I know. Go back to sleep,” I cooed, my voice barely louder than a whisper.
“I’m tired of this life. I’m tired of feeling scared. I’m tired of hiding who I am and who I was. I can’t live like this. I just want someone to see me as I am. I don’t want to be broken anymore.”
“Alina, I see you. The sparkly, shiny, happy parts and the dulled-by-pain parts. I can see how beautiful you are. How smart you are. How determined and brave you are. I see how pure your heart is. I see all of you, darlin’.”
Through the darkness of the night and on the cusp of the new dawn, it was exactly in that moment, as blindingly obvious as a solar flare, I still loved Alina Simpson. If I were ever going to be completely honest with myself, then now was the time. I don’t think I’d ever stopped loving her.
“Promise you won’t leave me.” She wore her insecurities on her sleeve, right next to her heart.
I promised her I wouldn’t, and it was one I knew I wanted to keep more than anything I had ever wanted in my entire life.
I was going to walk with her back into the light so she no longer had a reason to fear the dark.
ChapterThirty-Three
Callum
The next days passed with Alina and me sleeping at the house together. We talked, and she’d agreed I would work during the day at the store and come back each evening to work on the house. The time was bittersweet, and with every nail driven into the floorboard, it was like another into my heart.
Progress on the house was the constant reminder she would be leaving. Whenever the pain of the realization got too much, I would push it to the back of my mind and slam the door shut. Neither of us mentioned it. It was easier to avoid the conversation if we both pretended it wasn’t required.
She let me hold her every night, and we’d fall asleep. Living in the moment was pure bliss, but with every day that passed, we edged closer to reality.
* * *
I closed the shop and rushed back to Alina. Charlie and Simone were coming for dinner, and the odd feeling of dining as two couples settled on me like a step in the right direction.
Alina was sitting cross-legged on the porch swing when I arrived, engrossed in the journal of her mother’s she’d found along with the photos. We hadn’t had any further conversation about the pictures, and I wondered if I should bring it up with her. Bottling up her feelings about it couldn’t be a good thing. The thought of her on the verge of a breakdown plagued my mind, and I was nervous to leave her again in case she needed me.
I couldn’t fail her again.
Today, her hair was loose, falling forward to curtain half of her face from my view while her finger traced along each line.
I climbed the stairs before she realized I was even there, but when she did, she lifted her face and shot me a smile that almost stopped my heart.
Bending over, I kissed her forehead as my hand smoothed the hair at the crown of her head.
“How was your day?” I asked as I pulled back.
Her eyes fluttered open.
“Busy.” Her eyebrows shot up, and the breath she expelled caused her hair to flutter. “I’ve been out in the field and reading my momma’s notes. She really knew what she was doing. See, look at this?”
