AllFreeNovel
Share Us
Michael could empathize with the pain of losing a parent but not two at once. “How did they die? If you don’t mind me asking.”
“Some drunk asshole lost control of his brand-new luxury SUV and drove it into our tent. I wasn’t home at the time, or I probably would have been crushed with them.”
“Christ, Josiah. Did the asshole serve time?”
“Two years for manslaughter.” Josiah released a bark of bitter laughter. “I guess the judge wasn’t very harsh because my parents were just two more homeless people the city didn’t have to deal with. For about a year I alternated between sleeping in shelters and on the street, depending on the weather, but shelters were...scarier than the street. Especially for a gay teenager. And then I met Andy.”
Josiah smiled, a genuinely happy smile, but he didn’t elaborate. He seemed to get caught up inside a more joyful time of his life, and Michael waited, unwilling to break his brief moment of peace.
“André Gustovo Colicchio, but he preferred Andy because it sounded less Italian,” Josiah continued, a fond smile quirking his pink lips. “He was about eight years older than me, which at seventeen, going on eighteen, sounds bad, but it wasn’t remotely sexual at first. I thought it was, because when he found me hiding under some cardboard in the pouring rain and offered me a bed for the night, I assumed what he wanted from me.”
Michael growled without realizing.
“All he did was let me sleep on his futon, so relax. He let me take a shower, gave me breakfast and clean clothes, and he offered to buy me a bus ticket out of Tulsa. Anywhere I wanted to go.”
“Did you take him up on that?”
“Not at first. Andy was kind but very, very sad. He actually let me stay for a week, and I spent every night waiting for him to join me, or demand something from me. But he didn’t. He fed me and bought me clean clothes, and we talked. A lot. I told him about my dream of being a nurse, and he told me about inheriting money from an uncle who’d recently passed and had been in the oil business. He didn’t know what to spend his money on, so he bought things for strangers.
“We became really close friends, and since he didn’t work, we did stuff together. Traveled, went to football games, museums, he even took me to Six Flags Over Texas for my eighteenth birthday. He helped me get my GED so I could take the classes I needed to become a certified nursing assistant, and he paid for that, too. And not once did he ask for sex or anything other than being his friend. His companion. I was the one who initiated a physical relationship.”
Michael sorted all this new information around in his head. The idea that someone had taken Josiah in with no ulterior motive and showered him with money was...weird. Suspicious. No one did that out of the goodness of their heart. And Josiah had already been taken in and taken advantage of by Seamus McBride, so what if this Andy person had been the one to groom Josiah into being that sort of submissive person? To accept what others gave him and then believe it was Josiah’s decision to add sex into the mix?
“I can hear you thinking doubts,” Josiah said. “The older man taking advantage of the young homeless teen, but I promise it wasn’t like that with Andy. With Seamus? Yes. I didn’t find out Andy’s whole story until I earned my certification. He took me out to dinner to celebrate, and when we got home that night he gave me a copy of his new, amended will.”
Michael’s upper body jerked with surprise. “His will?”
“Yeah.” His dark eyes sparkled with grief. “Apparently, a few weeks before we met, Andy had been diagnosed with cancer. It was his fourth battle in twelve years, and he didn’t want to fight anymore. He just wanted to live his life, maybe make a difference, and if possible, fall in love before he died. That night, he told me he’d done all three of those things by meeting me. He was the only person besides my parents who’d ever said they loved me. And I loved him back.”
Michael didn’t know how to respond to that, especially at zero dark thirty and on a severe lack of sleep, so he stayed quiet and allowed Josiah to finish this tragic story.
“I promised to take care of him,” Josiah said, voice hoarse, cheeks flushed, and he spoke to his lap rather than Michael. A single tear dripped down the side of Josiah’s nose. It took all of Michael’s self-control not to reach out and wipe it away. “But Andy didn’t want that. So he left. I went to work one day, came home, and he wasn’t there. His phone was disconnected. I checked the online obituaries for nine days until his name appeared.”
“How did he die?” Michael asked when Josiah didn’t speak.
“Hypothermia. The police and medical examiner said he just sat down in an alley in January, went to sleep and never woke up. He left me, too, and I would have stayed with him until the end.” Another tear followed the first.
The second tear shredded Michael’s restraint. He circled the bed so he had room to climb on next to Josiah and tuck the trembling man close to his chest. He wrapped his arms around Josiah and hugged him as tight as he dared, hoping to take some of the grief and replace it with support and affection. Josiah sagged against him, not hugging back, but he also wasn’t pulling away. He existed, as if he’d lost the energy to do anything else.
Michael hadn’t expected to hear so much of Josiah’s personal life story when he came in to wake him, but he was incredibly grateful that Josiah had finally opened up to him. Shared some incredibly personal experiences and heartbreak. Michael hated that he was hurting but there was no demon to fight right now, no enemy to defeat other than a few ghosts that still lingered in Josiah’s mind. All he could do was hold Josiah and hope he was doing something to help his friend chase those ghosts away.
Josiah didn’t cry after the first few tears slipped out without permission. He’d mourned Andy’s death a long time ago, but like any kind of grief, sometimes it bubbled up and out with no warning, especially when his guard was down. And his guard came down way too easily around Michael Pearce. Michael’s very presence made it safe to be vulnerable and express his emotions in ways he’d hadn’t allowed himself for years.
Michael made him believe he could fall in love again; he might have been a little bit in love already.
He leaned against Michael’s broad chest and existed in the older man’s body heat, scent, and the steady thump of his heart beneath Josiah’s ear. For the first time since that wonderful first kiss in the bed of Elmer’s pickup, Josiah knew he was safe. Protected. Wanted. “Stay,” he whispered.
Fingers lightly stroked his shoulder and down his back. “Are you sure?”
“Yes. I like the way you hold me.”
“I’ll hold you for as long as you need. Promise.”
Michael hadn’t changed out of his jeans and flannel shirt, and while he left his jeans on—Josiah appreciated that more than he could say, even though it had to be uncomfortable—he did take off the flannel to reveal a white sleeveless tee. He climbed under the covers and scooted up close to Josiah, arranging them so Josiah leaned against his chest, using Michael like a human pillow. His head still hurt but he didn’t care anymore.
This was right.
He closed his eyes and slept.
