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Pushing up from the chair, I pocketed my phone and went to find out what had imploded in the short time that I'd hidden away to talk to Brian.
Chapter 4
Brian
The cafe was absolute chaos with the waning brunch crowd, and I was tucked into a back corner as my husky form didn't comfortably fit at the more central tables. I'd shown up an hour early because I'd needed a moment to calm my nerves. I silently laughed at myself because my hands were sweaty with anticipation, and I swore I was on the edge of a panic attack. It all seemed so foolish since I had to be at least fifteen years older than Stanton.
Since I'd spoken to him the night before, our conversation kept circling in my mind. Why did the gorgeous man want me to be his boy? It made no sense to me. Wouldn't he want someone more like himself? I didn't consider myself an unattractive man, but my looks fit a man in his mid-forties. Although, the premature silver hair aged me. The jangle of the bell above the door sounded too loud with the already overwhelming volume inside the cafe.
I looked up as Stanton entered, wearing jeans that showcased trim hips and legs, and an electric blue v-neck t-shirt that showed off a leanly muscled upper body. Even casually dressed, Stanton was elegant, and I felt like a hulking brute next to him. He raised his hand to run his fingers through his mussed, honey-blond hair, and as he glanced around the room, I held my breath. My chest ached with anticipation when stormy-gray eyes stopped on me. His soft lips that I’d only felt a total of three times curved into a smile that instantly brightened his handsome face.
He wove through the maze of tables until he stopped beside the one I was sitting at. "Hey, baby, I didn't keep you waiting, did I?" he asked, as he pinched my chin like he'd done in my office, and tipped my head back. Stanton slowly kissed me, suckling so gently on my lower lip. I felt his groan as he released my chin to stroke his fingertips along my bearded jaw. "My day just got a hundred times better," he whispered, and then kissed me one more time before he took the seat across from me. "You didn't answer me, did I keep you waiting?"
"No, no, I—" I cut myself off and he arched a brow at me. "I was nervous, so I showed up early."
"Thank you for being honest with me. They're busy! Is it always this way?"
"It's the tail end of Sunday brunch, I forgot about that. Do you want to go somewhere else?"
"This is the place you picked because you were comfortable meeting here. I do require copious amounts of coffee, though. My night was longer than I planned."
"What happened?" I asked as he shook his head.
"Two testosterone-driven bros fighting over the same girl. I had to deescalate it before the birthday girl's party was ruined. The party didn't end until four AM since it was a private event and I slipped into my lonely bed thinking about you at six."
I couldn't remember the last time I'd felt confident, but the way Stanton studied me—his smile made me feel special as if he really wanted to be there with me. A pretty server approached the table, Stanton asked if I needed a refill, and I shook my head, so he ordered a coffee. She left a few menus on the table and left us alone. I hadn't missed her interest or the way her cheeks pinked when Stanton had smiled at her.
Yet as soon as she was gone, his attention was right back on me. He rested his forearms on the table and his fingertips brushed the backs of my hands. His paler, smoother ones looked so odd beside my larger hands. Again, I tried to pinpoint the last time a man had shown me a public display of affection, a kiss that showed others we were probably more than friends. Stanton clearly had no issues announcing with his actions that we were together—at least on a date.
"We could've rescheduled if you were—" My teeth snapped together so quickly they clicked when he laced his fingers through mine and brought my hand to his mouth to brush a kiss to my knuckles.
"If lunch and our afternoon go well, you can join me for a nap before I have to send you home."
"Getting a little ahead of yourself, aren't you?" I asked, my cheeks heating as my voice cracked.
"I didn't say I was going to try to fuck you, I just said a nap." He pressed another kiss to my knuckles and closed his eyes. "Boy, I'm dying to cuddle you. Maybe a movie and takeout at my place for dinner. If you don't find me totally insufferable by the time dinner times comes around." He winked at me and I couldn't resist the compulsion to roll my eyes at him.
I felt a sense of loss when the server returned to drop off his coffee and he released my hands. She asked if we were we ready to order. We both declined as we hadn't even glanced at the menu and she said she'd be back shortly.
"You recommend anything?"
"I've tried just about everything they have. This is close to my apartment so when I work late, I normally get takeout from here. Which means I get a lot of takeout." I hated to admit that most nights I worked until I had no choice but to power down my computer and reluctantly head home with barely a few hours to relax before I had to get myself into bed only to start the grind over again a few hours later.
"That's unacceptable. My mother doesn't approve of people working to the detriment of their personal lives."
"She did come to my office after you left the other day and asked why I wasn't at lunch. Since the divorce, I'm still trying to find my way."
"I can’t believe someone would let you get away.”
Once again, I felt the sting of heat in my cheeks and hid it by making a show of checking out my menu, when I could probably list everything on it without a mistake. I needed a minute to gather my thoughts. There was a neediness building in the pit of my stomach. Other than some Daddy Kink in the bedroom, I'd always made sure I purported myself in a manner that never let me appear vulnerable.
I didn't know how to allow myself to be unprotected and in that past year I'd wrapped that strong appearance around me like a shield. Stanton wouldn't allow that; I could sense he'd demand I show him all my scars and still healing wounds. He terrified me. I wanted to be the type of person who could allow everything to fade away under someone else's care, but I never had been. Most of the time I was too exhausted to do more than exist.
"Baby, are you okay?" Stanton's voice drew me from my troubled thoughts, and I realized he'd hooked a finger over the top of my menu to pull it down, without me even noticing.
"Sorry, I sometimes get lost in my head for no reason at all."
"If you want to talk about him, I'm right here to help." I was about to explain that it wasn't important, but he stretched out his arm to stroke his fingertips down my cheek. "I'm aware that you don't trust me yet, but I promise I want to hear your thoughts, doesn't matter how big or small."
