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I didn’t know what the hell I was doing.
Thank God I had Melissa.
For now.
Currently studying online for her Master’s, Melissa took the night shift when I was away. A month ago, when she told me she’d lost her studio apartment, I offered her a room until she found a new place. It was taking longer than I expected.
First, she had exams, then a practicum that took her out of town for a week before changing to every other weekend, and now the first draft of her final dissertation was due.
I sighed. I didn’t want to lose her. She was marvellous with Sia. Kerry, the daytime nanny and housekeeper, couldn’t praise her enough.
Nevertheless, it was time she got her own place.
Especially if I ever hoped to introduce someone to mine.
Hope’s stricken face when I walked out of the sunroom filled my memory.
I’d expected her to be cold and unforgiving at the next day’s shoot. Other than radiating a slightly dimmer light, there was no change in her demeanour.
And she was not a woman who hid her feelings well. Perhaps I did not affect her the way she affected me.
I lost her before the dream of having her had fully formed.
It was better this way.
I had no business starting something with her. Like a black hole, I’d suck all the light from her life.
And if I fell for her and she left? It would fuck the hell out of mine.
Hope
Slamming the hot chocolate down on the counter, I messaged Ava.
Bestie: You up?
Better Half: Just came offline. Did you just get back?
Bestie: Got back this morning but I’m thinking I should have just stayed there.
I filled the kettle while I waited for her response, then set it to boil.
Better Half: What happened?
Bestie: There? Or here?
Better Half: Both.
Bestie: I got off the airplane and got a message from the girls asking to get together tonight to decide what direction we want to take our dance troupe.
While the water boiled, I found the largest mug I owned and dumped two packages of hot chocolate mix into it.
Better Half: Uh, oh.
Bestie: Right? Except I didn’t even think about that. Just wondered why we weren’t bringing new music ideas. As soon as I got there, I knew something was up. Half of the girls looked uncomfortable, and the other half determined.
I opened the pantry door and rooted around.
Better Half: And Victoria?
