Page 81 of Crash and Burn


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“Love,” I sigh. “To feel whole. To know I’m welcome in whatever space I enter.” I pull back to meet his eyes, but twine my fingers behind his neck to keep us connected. “I want to know, without ever having to wonder, that I’m loved and wanted.”

“Well…” He studies me with a thoughtful gaze and leads me in a slow sway. “I don’t say this to invalidate your feelings, but I struggle to imagine you’ve entered any room where you’ve not been welcome or loved.”

I choke out a soft laugh. “Just my whole life.” Then I gesture around the ballroom “My parents never RSVPed to this party. They didn’t even acknowledge the invitation, though theyknewit was important to me.”

And then there’s Axel. The one who told me outright I was unwanted. Unloved. Unworthy.

“I’ve become quite skilled at putting on a face and pretending the world doesn’t hurt. But I’m not immune to insecurity.”

“And yet,” his lips curl into a handsome smile, “I’m one of about two dozen men who watch you right now. You might be the prettiest person in the room, Hannah Sullivan. You have the body of a supermodel, and the wit of a comedian. At the risk of sounding whiney and weird,” he chuckles, “I’ve been waiting for the punchline ever since you asked me here tonight.”

Confused, my brows pull together. “The punchline?”

“I was sure your invitation was a prank. And when I couldn’t find you earlier, I was certain that wasit. The joke. Being stood up.”

“That’s awful.” I step closer and press my cheek to his chest, if only to comfort him. To assure him.

But a lie is still a lie, right?

I didn’t ask him as a prank, but I asked, knowing he was the safe option. I’m dancing with him now, fully aware of the fact I was having sex with someone else just minutes ago. Hugging him now, but shamefully looking straight into Axel Feeney’s incensed stare while he waits on the edge of the dancefloor.

“I’m sorry you worried, Jase. I’m not a cruel woman, I swear.”

“Then answer me with truth now. Raul. The one who keeps staring?”

“My friend.”

“Hmm… and Axel? The one with no manners and a possessive streak a mile wide?”

I exhale an exhausted sigh and close my eyes to break my connection with the very man we speak of. “The love of my life. But I’m trying really hard to get over him.”

“So, not a prank,” Jase pulls back and cups my jaw until my eyes flicker open, “but a seat-warmer. It’s okay,” he cuts in before I can respond with something truthful, but not hurtful. “Whatever’s going on, it’s about you and him. I can respect that.Andmake him crankier by having my hand on your back.”

I choke out a laugh and feel the vise I had no clue was tightening around my throat, loosen. “I’m sorry if my actions have made you question your worth.”

“Nah.” He draws patterns on my bare back, taunting, because of the audience he’s fully aware we have. “That’s between you and the dude. Does he treat you well?”

“Axel?” I glance his way and look him up and down. Take in his suit. Thick thighs, and broad shoulders. His flexing jaw, and watchful eyes. “He used to. For as long as I’ve known him, he’s been my Prince Charming, the guy I trusted my heart and soul to. But then someone close to him died. It messed him up and resulted in him making poor choices.”

“Did he hurt you? Physically?”

“Oh gosh, no way. Not in a million years. But he said things that made me question my worth. He set out to scare me away, because he was worried about his own mortality in a job that is exceptionally dangerous. He thought he could save me from potential future grief by hurting me in the present and walking away.”

“And did it work?”

I scoff under my breath and close my eyes. “Yup. He hurt me. Really bad.” I lick my dry lips. “He said some awful things. Then he left town for a long time and left me wondering. Worrying.”

“And now?”

“Now he’s back,” I sigh. “And as much as I want to hate him, my heart still thinks he’s the love of my stupid life.”

Jase hears the exasperation in my tone, so his chest jumps with muted laughter. “Well, you seem thrilled about it. Gonna give the dude another chance toproveto you that you’re worthy? Or are you gonna keep inviting me places so you have a buffer and a way to tease him?”

“Depends…” My lips curl into a smile. “How open is your schedule? Because I’m a patient person, and he’s…not. The longer I drag this out, the better the revenge sex will be.”

He snorts and surprises me with a dip mid-dance. “Vixen. Whatever he said to you, however many apologies he owes, I find it interesting that I pity the man.” He drops a kiss on my cheek and pulls me up to standing once more. “I feel for him, to have a woman as beautiful and kind as you mad at him…” Mock sad, he shakes his head. “It would surely make for a miserable existence.”

“Don’t feel bad for him.” I roll my eyes and laugh when Axel’s arms grow larger with impatience. “He’s an ass. He needs time to sit in a corner and think about his actions a little more.”

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