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I need to do better. Learn how to balance my need for perfection without being an overbearing asshole. Have I always been like this? Do all my employees back in New York secretly hate me and Amber’s just the only person with the courage to say it to my face?
Fuck. I think they might.
“Oh no, somebody’s spiralling.”
My sister’s frowning face fills the screen on my phone. In the background I can hear my four-year-old niece, Maya, making a truly unholy amount of noise.
I ignore Nel’s statement and ask, “What’s she doing?”
“Making music!” Maya screams in the background. Nel tilts the camera over her shoulder until Maya’s in frame and I can see that she’s got a cooking pot in one hand and a lid in the other. “You wanna hear my song, Uncle Finn?”
“Nope!” Nel says quickly. “He doesn’t want to hear.In fact, Uncle Finn wants you to go to your room and find that new toy he sent you last week.”
Maya’s eyes light up. She immediately drops the pot and lid and quickly scampers away to complete this new mission.
“That’ll buy us maybe five minutes,” Nel says once Maya has disappeared. “So be quick. What’s wrong?”
“Nothing’s wrong,” I say. “Can’t I just check in?”
I don’t know why I bother lying to Nel. There’s no one else on this planet who knows me as well as she does. We’re only ten months apart and we’ve been stuck to each other from the day she was born. I don’t have to pretend like everything’s all right with Nel, like I’m not constantly struggling to stay afloat in a sea of my insecurities, only seconds away from drowning.
I don’thaveto pretend, but I still do. Not that it ever works out in my favour.
“I wasn’t joking when I said we’ve only got five minutes, Finn. Shewillbe back with more things to make even more noise. So spill.”
I run a hand down my face and bite back the groan I feel building in the very depths of my chest. There’s so much I want to say, but I lead with the easiest thing. “Ernest won’t get off my back.”
Nel snorts. Neither of us are very fond of our dear old Uncle Ernest. “Since when is that news?”
She’s right of course, but it feels different this time. I tell her everything that happened with the call earlier this week and the check-in emails he’s started sending every other day. By the time I’m finished, the frown on her face mirrors mine.
“What a dick.” She says the last word quietly, just in case Maya is in earshot. “You’d think he’d be over this weird feud with Dad by now, wouldn’t you? And remember how he didn’t even want to give you the managing director job in the first place? Sounds like he’s looking for any reason to get proved right.”
“I’m not going to give it to him.”
Nel grins. “Damn right you’re not. How’re things going with the launch?”
“Things are on track,” I tell her. I’ve officially settled on food and drink suppliers, I’ve started the process to hire a property manager, and Amber has everything in control on her side of things. Her face flashes suddenly in my mind. She’s wearing her signature unimpressed look — the one it seems she’s reserved solely for me — her pretty face twisted into a frown. I shake my head and dispel the image in my mind.
This would be the right moment to tell Nel about everything that happened today. With Cynthia. With Amber. With me apparently being as much of a controlling dick as my uncle. But the words won’t come. Instead I say, “Do you think I’m nice to work with?”
Nel’s eyes widen a fraction and then she barks out a laugh. “Do I think you’reniceto work with?”
I glare at my sister. “Just answer the question.”
“I thinkyou’rea nice guy, yes. But would I want to work under you?” She wrinkles her nose. “Absolutely not.”
“I’m being serious, Nel.”
Her expression softens slightly. “What happened?”
“It’s been brought to my attention that maybe I’m not the easiest person to work with,” I tell her. Her lip twitches slightly, but she doesn’t say anything. “That maybe I’m a bit of a micromanager.”
“A bit?”
I scowl at her. “Yes. Just a bit.”
“You’re under a lot of pressure,” she says slowly, and I can tell she’s carefully considering her words. “Nobody can blame you for being a bithands-on.”
