AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“Have you ever thought about moving out?”
Amber blinks at me, once, twice, and then barks out a sharp laugh. “Yes, I’ve thought about moving out. It’s just not that simple for all of us.”
There’s an underlying implication in her words when she says ‘all of us’ and I immediately feel like an ass.
“Was that a little tone deaf?” I ask sheepishly.
“Incredibly. But…” she says, with a little wink. “I’ll forgive you this time since the lunch you bought us today was truly phenomenal.”
A sense of relief washes over me.
“And I am moving out, by the way,” she adds, almost defensively. “I’m in the process anyway. I’ve found a place and I think–” Her expression turns almost shy. “I think I’m going to put an offer on it?”
It’s a statement, but it comes out sounding more like a question – like she can’t quite believe she’s even considering it.
I’m pretty sure the level of pride I can feel for her that’s blooming in my chest right now isn’t normal, but I let myself feel it all the same.
“It’s nothing special,” she says quickly, and my heart immediately sinks. Here she is, telling me about a huge achievement in her life, and the first thing she does is try and minimise it. I can’t tell if she’s just trying to get ahead of whatever she thinks her mother might say, or if her mother has just managed to chip down her sense of worth over the years, that negatively qualifying something like this is just second nature to her now.
“And it’s quite small, and–”
“Don’t do that.”
Her brows furrow. “Don’t do what?”
“Make yourself small.”
Her lips part and, even with the distant sound of the contractors working below us, I swear I can hear the way her breath catches in her throat.
“You don’t have to do that around me, sweetheart.”
I’m not going to dismiss you. I’m not going to make you feel like your wins don’t matter.
The realisation that her life is apparently filled with people who do make her feel like this is a sobering one, and I refuse to be one of them.
The beginnings of a soft smile starts to form as she gives me a small nod. “Okay.” She dips her head for a moment and when she looks back at me, there’s a new fire behind her eyes. “I’m going to look for some things to add to my mood board for my house while I’m at the fair.”
I grin.That’s my girl.
“Are you going with anyone?”
She shakes her head. “Usually I’d ask Bailey if she wants to come. She’s not into design like I am, but I’m sure we could make a day of it.”
“What would ‘making a day of it’ entail?” I ask, genuinely curiously. I know very little of what Amber does during her free time. A streak of jealously shoots through me as I consider that Amber has a whole life outside of these walls that I’m not part of.
“We’d probably go for lunch somewhere after,” she says. “Or maybe we’d have a picnic. The weather’s supposed to be good this weekend, and there’s a beautiful park not far from the fair.” She sighs and seems to deflate slightly into her bean bag. “But Bailey is– She’s going through some things right now.”
She doesn’t elaborate and I don’t ask, sensing it’s not a topic she’s willing to share on.
“As much as I’d love to drag her out of the house, she probably wouldn’t be down for it. So, I’ll just go by myself,” she says with a little shrug. “It’ll still be a fun day. Might take myself out for lunch after.”
“Haven’t we set a lunch precedent?” I ask, my mouth moving before my brain can really comprehend what I’m about to say. I hold up my half eaten bánh mì and raise a pointed brow. “I buy the lunches around here.”
“At work,” she says, sounding at least a little amused. “When we’re in the same building all day. It doesn’t count on a weekend when I’m at a fair and you’re…” She trails off and frowns. “Doing whatever it is you do on the weekend.”
Work, mostly.
I’ve explored embarrassingly little of London during my time here, something Nel is sure to scold me about when I get back home.
