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“Deep breath now,” Nurse MacIntosh said.
She worked quickly and efficiently, but even so, Dora felt herself clench as the speculum slid in. It might be smaller than the original one but Dora still bit her lip as it was cranked open. Tears stung her eyes by the time it was over.
“Well done,” Nurse Cain said, patting her hand.
After exchanging her gloves for a fresh pair, Nurse MacIntosh checked Dora’s breasts, her strong fingers palpating the tissue from the ruddy nipples down the sides to underneath her arms.
“Normal healthy breast tissue,” she said to Nurse Cain, who was leaning over the chart. “Did we get her medical records?”
“Yes. She’s due for a tetanus shot. And a cholesterol screening might be a good idea.”
“Not might. Is.” Nurse MacIntosh stood, and Dora stared up at the ceiling. The head nurse hadn’t mentioned her weight, but the comment about the test was a reminder that even if the staff didn’t fat-shame, she was still seen as fat.
“I hate needles,” she said.
“Who doesn’t?” Nurse Cain was pulling things from a drawer. “Do we need to restrain you?”
“Restrain…?” Dora looked down, noticing for the first time that there were cuffs on the sides and foot of the table. “N-no. Of course not.”
“Do you get lightheaded? If you do, it’s best to just lie here. Unless you want to sit up.”
Dora told her she’d rather stay as she was, and when Nurse Cain brought over a tray with two syringes—one with the tetanus medication and the empty one for the blood draw—and told Dora to look away and think on something pleasant, she knew just what to think of.
Dora thought of Professor Robinson with his dark hair and dark eyes and intelligent, cultured voice. She thought of his handsome features, his sculpted cheekbones, his height, his commanding presence balanced with kindness. She thought of how her tummy fluttered when he smiled at her, how flushed and warm it made her. She thought with a bit of delicious shame how it would feel to bring him back the sticker, to see him pleased. She thought of his words of praise and when she did, a sweet-throbbing ache settled between her thighs and that is what she concentrated on, that secret, hidden sensation that was stronger than the discomfort of the needles.
Then it was over. She’d done it and couldn’t contain her happiness when, after she was dressed, Nurse Cain handed her a sticker.I Was a Brave Girl.She had been and it was all because of Alastair Robinson. She tucked the sticker in a pocket of the skirt she was wearing and headed toward the home Bobbi shared with Dr. Weston. Bobbi had invited her over to play, and after being assured it was perfectly okay to borrow one of the Ranch’s golf carts, she followed the directions Bobbi had given her. Dora couldn’t help but think what a good day she was having. The only thing that would have made it more perfect would have been if she’d not had to skip her service sub duties, but she was glad she’d gotten the appointment out of the way, and that she was going to go spend time with a friend and afterward present Alastair with her sticker.
It was a nice day for a drive. As a member of the staff, Dr. Weston had a nice log house at Rawhide Ridge, a neighborhood adjacent to the original Ranch grounds accessible by a tidy gravel path. The whole neighborhood was beautiful and well-maintained and felt a world apart from the depressing house she’d shared with her mother. Dora had told her she’d taken a job at a resort but hadn’t specified where, not that it mattered. Dora knew her mother only wanted her out so she could get rid of all her things and replace them with shelves for her doll collection.
Dora knew she was at the right place when she saw Bobbi’s adult-sized tricycle with the glittery tassels fluttering from the end of the handlebars. The front porch stretched across the front of the house. Windchimes clanged musically from one end. On the other was a porch swing. Bobbi was so lucky to have her own Daddy and such a pretty house.
“Dora!” The front door burst open, and Bobbi came rushing out. She was dressed as a cowboy, complete with fake six-shooters and a drawn-on moustache. “Howdy, partner!”
“Wow. Look at you!”
“I’m Sheriff Bobby today. Bobby with a ‘Y’. But you can call me Sheriff Robert.” She took Dora’s hands and practically dragged her up the front steps into the house, kicking a pair of tennis shoes out of the way as they entered. “I thought we’d play dress up. You can be anything you want.”
As she slammed the door, a familiar voice came from down the hall. “Quiet, Bobbi. Daddy’s about to have a Zoom call with a client.”
“Okay, Daddy!”
Bobbi’s voice dropped to a whisper. “Come on.” She tip-toed down the hall in exaggerated style until they reached a staircase which led to the second floor. There were three bedrooms, the largest of which was used for an enviable playroom. Dora couldn’t help but gawk; she’d never seen anything like it. There was a castle-shaped fort big enough for two or three people. In the corner was a fake tree covered in fairy lights where a realistic toy sloth hung from one of the branches. Bobbi introduced the creature as Sidney before directing Dora’s attention to a floor-to-ceiling shelf unit stuffed with plushies, board games, books, puzzles and LEGO sets. The floor was covered in a colorful rug, part of which was a hopscotch board. A seventy-inch television graced one wall above three huge bean bag chairs. And then there was the dress-up trunk jammed full of the most amazing things Dora had ever seen.
Bobbi dropped down to paw through the outfits. “Daddy fixed up this room for my birthday last year.” She pulled out a satin robe edged in faux fur and put it aside. “I’m spoiled. Daddy says it’s not nice to say that but it’s true. I’m the luckiest Little in the whole wide world.” She stood, snatching up the robe as she turned to Dora. She was also holding a crown and a scepter which she held out to Dora. “You can be a princess. Have you ever played Cowboys and Princesses?”
Bobbi didn’t give her a chance to answer as she explained the rules of the game Dora suspected she was making up as she went along. In addition to the crown which her hyperactive friend perched on her head, she found herself in a flowing robe and even a voluminous wraparound skirt that she suspected had been purchased with her in mind since there was no need for the waif-like Bobbi to have such a thing for herself.
It was a magical afternoon, and for the first time, Dora lost herself in the magic of play. She couldn’t help but admire Bobbi, who she realized was gender fluid. She was so comfortable in her own skin, so at ease, and so accepting of Dora as a playmate. When the imaginary Mr. Poopbreath—Bobbi’s imaginary villain—tied Dora to a tree in the front yard, her friend valiantly battled him with her sword before finishing him off with her six-shooters, explaining all the while that only she could see Mr. Poopbreath through his invisibility cloak. Afterward, as Bobbi untied Dora from the tree, she quietly asked that she not tell Dr. Weston about the part where she shot Mr. Poopbreath. “Daddy doesn’t approve of me killing people with my guns, not even in play.”
Dora was even invited to sleep over, an offer she would have accepted under any other circumstances, but she was going to have ice cream with Alastair Robinson. She didn’t share this with Bobbi, not because she was ashamed but because being asked felt like a secret treasure and she wanted to privately savor the invitation without being overwhelmed with questions or assumptions.
After returning the golf cart, she reached into her pocket, touching the sticker as she walked. A smile crossed her face. She’d only been at Rawhide Ranch a short time, but already she was feeling so much more positive. She knew she still had work to do, but this was the first place where she’d felt accepted and not looked down on as the awkward fat kid.
“Hey, Dora! That’s your name, right?”
She turned upon hearing her name and it took a moment to recognize the girl sitting on the low branch of a tree outside the lodge. It was Maribel, the student who’d been draped over Alastair’s desk the day before.
She stopped and smiled. “Yeah.”
