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He had gotten up earlier than me, but then I had slept later than I normally did. I wasn’t sure if that was supposed to be his excuse for being silent or not staying in bed with me. I didn’t respond. I didn’t know what he wanted me to say to that.
“You’re here because I want to fuck you. A lot.”
That got my attention. My eyes snapped back to his. He had a serious expression on his face.
“Once, we were more. That’s not what I want now. But I do want to fuck you. We were always good at that even if we sucked at the other stuff.” He smirked. “What we did yesterday was just foreplay. I wanted to ease you into it.”
I opened my mouth and closed it again. The right words were all jumbled up in my head. Somehow, he’d now made everything feel cheap and twisted. When we were together, I felt something that I’d thought was mutual. It just showed how naive I was.
“I’m not like Destiny,” I blurted out.
“I know. Destiny and I have an understanding. She’s been around for a while. That’s not what this is. I’m not asking for you to come fuck me when I need it. What I want from you is temporary. Today, I want to fuck you until I’ve had my fill. Once I’ve gotten you out of my system, it’ll be over.”
Ouch. I should have just given him a knife and had him plunge it into my stomach. I had thought I liked honesty. Come to find out, there were some truths that were too painful. The lie I’d let myself get wrapped up in with him yesterday only made the reality more brutal. I wasn’t ready for guys like Gage. I still needed to get the hang of dating normal guys. Less intense guys. The ones who didn’t wreak havoc on my emotions.
At least his harsh explanation had cleared up my head. I moved my chair back, needing to get some space and to text my uncle to come get me.
“I, uh, thanks for clearing that up,” I replied, not looking at him. “But I came here to be your nurse. I can’t—I’m not …” I paused, closing my eyes for a minute to try and put my thoughts into words without sounding vulnerable. “I’ve not had a relationship. Not one I remember. As much as I enjoyed yesterday and the things we did, I just can’t. I’m sorry.” I barely glanced at him before picking up my plate and cup, then heading to the sink. I’d hardly touched my cinnamon roll. My stomach was too knotted up to think about food.
I heard the cast hit the ground. He was getting up. Hopefully to go in the living room, where I could avoid him until I left. I put the rest of my cinnamon roll down the food disposal, then rinsed off my plate and cup to put them in the dishwasher. He was walking closer to me. Not farther away.
Closing my eyes tightly, I took several deep breaths, preparing myself for whatever it was he would say to me now. With Gage, I never knew if those words were going to slice through me or make me a puddle of goo in his hands. I didn’t turn around to face him as I waited for him to stop walking and just say something already. Get this over with.
I felt his hands on either side of mine, caging me in, and my eyes snapped open as the heat from his body moved in behind me. His warm breath caressed the side of my neck, and I shivered. I hated myself in that moment. I hated how weak I was and how he affected me.
“You smell so fucking good,” he whispered, pressing a kiss against my skin.
His mouth brushed against my neck as he left a trail of kisses. “I’m sorry my words came out like they did. They were callous, and I’m afraid that was more for my sake than yours.”
I swallowed and sucked in a breath. “I think I should just go. I’m not equipped to handle you.”
A deep chuckle vibrated from his chest as he pressed in closer to me. I could feel his erection against my lower back.
“Baby, you’re the only woman on earth who is equipped to fucking handle me. You just don’t remember.”
Had I really been able to deal with this man?
I shook my head. “I’m beginning to think you were the one who destroyed me.”
One of his hands flattened against my stomach, pressing me hard into him. “The past is over. We won’t repeat it. Those feelings are no longer an issue for me.” The deep growl in his voice made me whimper. I wasn’t sure if it was fear or need.
“Have you fucked since the accident?” he asked in a soft voice against my ear.
I closed my eyes and shook my head.
“Then, it’s only right that I’ll be the first one to take this pussy,” he said, then shoved his hand down the front of my shorts. “Again.”
My knees slightly buckled, and his free hand grabbed my hip, squeezing hard.
“I’ll show you how good it’s supposed to feel. Teach you what you need and what makes you scream out in pleasure.”
Gage Presley was very good with words. My mind was screaming at me that this was a terrible idea. This man was going to mess up my head worse than he already had. But my body was so hungry for what he was promising that I wasn’t sure I could fight it.
When his fingers began to slide through my slickness, he groaned in my ear. “Fuck, you’re soaking wet. Your body knows how good I can make it feel. Just shut off everything else.” He pressed a kiss to my temple. “Forget all the other stuff. Let’s just be us for today.”
But tomorrow will come, my head reminded me.
Unfortunately, the area between my legs was shouting louder. I was going to have sex someday. Why not let my first be with someone who knew my body? He had already managed to hurt me emotionally. I wasn’t going to do this and think that love was next. This was just sex. Why not enjoy it and learn what I liked?
