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Morgan holds her drink up in cheers. “Both.”
“Oh my God,” Ryder murmurs, his hand covering his mouth which he probably regrets opening because now her attention is on him.
“Yeah. So thisproof. I want to see it,” Morgan demands.
“No,” Ryder quips, no debate in his voice.
“It’s not up to you.” His sister doesn’t relent.
“Yeah, it is. I don’t think you need to relive it again. Once was enough.” He’s not wrong for sure, but Morgan keeps arguing as he finally cuts her off. “Why, Morgan? Why the fuck would you want to watch it?”
“I’m not afraid to watch it.” Something in her voice is less stern than it should be.
That tone makes me walk up to her, move my arms around her lower back. “You don’t have to prove that to yourself. You’re out of it, Morgan.” I whisper so only she can hear me, “Watching it won’t make the nightmares go away.”
Her hands grip my shoulders as she moves her mouth to return a whisper in my ear, “Remember, I am the nightmare.”
13
MORGAN
Ryder tries to evade me once again, but I corner him in the hallway. “I want to see it. Now.”
“Goddamn it, Morgan.” Ryder reclines back against the wall. From his defeated posture, I think he’s finally going to give in and show me the freaking video. But he remains steadfast. “I’ve told you for the last hour, the answer is still no. And it’s not going to change.”
I take a step forward, my rage pinned on him. “I have every right to watch it.”
“Yes, you do,” he utters. “But nothing good can come out of you seeing yourself like that again. You keep saying you’re fine, but I know you’re not. And I’m not going to hand over the thing that’ll send you off the rails again.”
“Dude, seriously? You won’t let me watch it because you think I’m not strong enough?” Laughing, I shake my head and down the remainder of my Jack and Coke.
Ryder is the last person I want to flip out on. But I’m so fucking sick and tired of these douches thinking I’m some weak, brittle bitch who’s going to break down and hide in the fucking corner.
“Just drop it for tonight. You’re not thinking lucidly.” He motions to the empty tumbler in my hand.
“You know I’m not going to give up until I get what I want.” And I want to see the goddamn recording.
“Yeah. That’s a given.” Ryder slips past me, cursing about me being a tenacious brat under his breath. At least he knows I’ll get my way in the end. If he didn’t want me to see it, he never should’ve mentioned it.
Heading downstairs to the kitchen, I grab a refill on my drink to make this night a little more pleasant and maybe to unwind my nerves a bit because the only thing I can think about is that damn video. I just need to watch it. There’s no way the footage of the abandoned hospital is worse than what has been in my head on repeat. Thinking about it prompts me to just take the entire bottle of Jack Daniels instead of stopping at my replenished glass.
I will sleep tonight, even if it’s because I pass the fuck out. I’m not sure it’ll take much more, because I’m already getting drowsy. The lack of rest over the last few nights isn’t helping me stay awake I’m guessing.
Most of the partyers have cleared out, but I spot Cade alone on the patio. His entire vibe has been sour tonight. Which is nothing new. But he went from clingy as fuck to hiding from me. So that gives me all the motivation I need to step outside.
There’s a steady drizzle but nothing too bad considering the storm is still passing over us. I’m not complaining since canceling the game made my dad angrier than hell. And seeing it was only for this piddly shit makes it that much more satisfying.
“What’re you smiling at?” Cade grumbles, breaking me out of my thoughts as I stare at the pool.
“That this is perfect weather for a swim.”
“Yeah. The lightning makes it ideal, Morgan.” Cade avoids looking to me as I take a long drink of whiskey before setting the bottle on the ground at my feet.
I grab the hem of my sundress and pull it over my head. When I open my eyes, I see him watching me as I drop it on the pavement at his feet. “Scared you might get a little charged up?” I ask, unhooking my bra and letting it fall.
I watch his body tense, track his eyes darting over to where some jackass lets out an encouraging whistle. Apparently, the twit doesn’t want to test Cade because as soon as he demands they go inside, they do. Pussies. Cade knows he won’t get that kind of authority over me. No one will.
“Oh, so protective still. Even when you hate me.” I hook a finger in my panties, running my fingers along the waistband but decide to keep them on.
