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I hold Layla’s gaze. “You did not get this far in your career by putting your own needs last. So I don’t understand why you’re okay with having a sub-par sex life. Is there something going on here that we don’t know about? Some sort of… mental block around intimacy?” She doesn’t say anything, and I sigh. “You deserve to enjoy sex, Layla. Do you want that?”
She nods.
I reach out my hand, palm up. After a second, she links her fingers with mine. “You don’t have to tell us anything personal. But we won’t judge you for it, if you do. Trust me, we’ve heard pretty much everything on the show.”
“Oh, aye,” Zack agrees. “We just got an email a couple days ago from a guy who could only come if a girl rubbed a balloon on his bits. The static got him off, or something.”
Layla’s lip twitches. “What did you tell him?”
“To buy the balloons wholesale from party stores so they’re cheaper.”
She closes her eyes. “Fine,” she mutters, her face burning. “I… when you were talking about that girl you dated… Monica, or whatever.”
I glance across at Zack. I’m not sure where this is going. “Yes?”
She shrugs awkwardly. “I like the thought of that a lot. That’s… what I think of when I’m in bed.”
It takes a second for me to realise what she means. Then the penny drops. “That’s what you imagine to get yourself off? Having a three-way?”
***
TWENTY-ONE
***
LAYLA
I set my jaw, looking Josh straight in the face. “Yes,” I say.
I expect him to look shocked or awkward; instead, he just shoots back: “What configuration?”
“What?”
“You want all guys? A guy and a girl?” His eyes bore into mine. “How many partners? Two? Three? Four?”
I feel like I’m getting drilled at an interview. “Jesus, does it matter? It’s not like it’s ever going to happen. It’s just a fantasy.”
His brow furrows. “Of course it matters,” he insists. “What you want matters. Own it. It’s not embarrassing.”
Christ. “Just guys,” I say. “Two or… three, maybe? I think I might struggle with four. I’d probably end up getting tangled in all the limbs.”
“You want the guys to get off with each other?” Josh presses, all business. “Or just be focussed on you?”
“What?”
“Just answer the question.”
“Dude, this is the funniest shit,” Zack whispers. “You’ve done it now, L. He’s in full saviour mode. He doesn’t have an off-switch.”
“Do you want the guys to be together?” Josh repeats impatiently.
Well, now I just sound selfish. “I mean, I wouldn’t mind,” I say. “But it wouldn’t do anything for me.”
“You’d like to sleep with two or three men, who are all focussed on getting you off,” Josh repeats back to me.“You know there are dating apps that can help you find multiple partners, right? They’d probably be a better choice than random dating websites.”
I shake my head. “Josh, this isn’t something I’m actually looking for. I can barely find one man I trust, let alone two or three.” I look down at my hands. “It’s a fantasy. Not something I actually want to put into reality.”
There’s a pause. “But you can,” Josh says quietly. He shifts his weight, bringing his face closer to mine. His warm breath touches my cheek, and I feel a hot pulse between my legs. “You can.”
