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"It’s gonna blow," Nikolai yells over the speakers.
No.
Time.
Must. Save. My. Boy.
Grabbing a parachute and my AK-47, I leap out of the chopper in the nick of time.
It veers toward a cluster of island rocks before slamming with profound impact.
Bam.
A fire cloud explodes into the blue sky as I unleash a barrage of bullets toward the men who are threatening to insert what looks like a fifteen-inch dildo into Dino’s ass.
"Let him go." My voice is deep. Low. Menacing.
"Ah, shit," Luigi drawls. "The eagle has landed."
"That’s not the code name we agreed upon." Petrie isn’t amused.
Dino’s eyes bulge. "Save me, Daddy!"
"No." Giuseppe’s voice is snarly. "You can’t say that. Another author has already used that in the title of a book and they’ll sue you if you say it."
"Rescue me, Daddy!"
"Don’t use that one either."
Dino scratches his temple. "Hitman Daddy?! But then I can’t ask Daddy for help!"
"That one’s… fine." Luigi smirks.
I lift my AK-47. "I am my precious boy’s hitman Daddy. No—his mob boss Daddy.Let him go before."
"Or what?"
"I’ll blow your brains out."
Nikolai, Igor, Timofey, and Demetri crash land beside me.
Their helicopters slam into the surrounding trees.
Up above, I squint and see Nonna and Nonno’s helicopter bouncing around amongst the clouds.
They’ve obviously forgotten they’re on a mission. Damn grandparents, senile already.
"Tug that dildo away from Dino’s ass." Igor aims a Glock at Luigi’s head.
"It’s not a dildo," Luigi spits out. "It’s an insertion device."
Dino waggles his eyebrows. "I hate to admit it but it’s making me tingle."
Dino moans, sinking onto the inserter of his own free will.
No one forces him to do it.
"No," I roar, running toward him.
