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“I’ll get that right for you,” I said to each one, and for once, I felt glad for my big, goofy smile. Cherise had gone home and now it was me and Andy, who watched me with increasing sympathy from the bar.
“I only got one more steak,” said the sous-chef, when I explained I needed two on order.
“Can you uncook this one a bit?” I said. He gave me a look that sent me scampering from the kitchen. But somehow they always came through.
It was closing time when I’d finally finished dealing with the customers. I finished my shift and sat down at the bar. There, I put my head in my hands and began to tear up. It had just been such a long day. I’d been at work for sixteen hours, and all of a sudden, I didn’t care about anything. I just wanted to get home and see Macy. I went into the corridor and up the stairs.
“Lola?” said a voice behind me.
I knew that voice; knew its dark tones, its harsh edge. It was Alex’s voice. But I’d never heard it so soft.
I turned around, and there he was. “What’s wrong?” he said. I turned away, sniffling.
“Don’t pretend like you care, Alex,” I said. I was tired of playing his games.
“I care enough. You’re one of my employees. Can’t we talk about what’s going on?”
“Nothing,” I said.
“You look like you’ve been crying.”
“Oh, no,” I said. “Just a little, I guess.”
But then I began to burst into tears.
He was at my side in a moment, and his strong arm was around me, his big hand on my shoulder. I looked up through the tears, and that night, something dazzled in his eyes. Not cold anymore, but warm.
“Come on,” he said. “Come and sit down for a bit.”
He took my hand in his, and I remembered how comforting it felt to have my hand wrapped in his gentle grip. I stepped into the office. It was warm and comfortable inside, elegantly decorated with antique wooden panels and an enormous desk, with a comfortable couch.
“I’m sorry,” he said. “I’ve been harsh, lately.”
I shook my head. “It’s fine,” I muttered. “What did I expect?”
“You can expect that sometimes I’ll act like an ass,” said Alex.
I smiled at that, and looked up into his eyes.
“Yeah?” I said, giggling a little and wiping away the last of my tears. Hewasan ass. But in some ways, he felt likemyass. Like he’d shown a softer side I hadn’t known was there.
“Yeah. I’m sorry. I just, well. I don’t always know how to be with you.”
The tension between us was flooding the room, the darkness heightening the sensation that it was just me and just him. Two warm bodies that were now unbearably close. I felt a safety and comfort in his presence now. Here in the office, I was reminded of a night long ago, before everything got so damn complicated.
“Have you ever tried being yourself?” I said.
“I guess,” said Alex. “Doesn’t always work out too well when you’re a guy like me.”
“You’re not that bad,” said Lola.
“I feel like I am sometimes,” said Alex. “When I look at you.”
“Don’t be silly,” I said, laughing.
In the closeness of the room, I could hear every sound. The beating of Alex’s heart, and the pounding of my own. I let my head fall onto his shoulder, and looked up at him.
He bent down and kissed me, and warmth spread from my lips into my chest.
