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Poppy’s lips pursed. “I’m not sure what the point is, to be honest.”
Neither was I.
I looked out over the crowd, but after a few moments, my gaze was drawn back to Poppy—to her loose hair and that damn gown. Gods, why did she have to be so beautiful? So fierce?
Her hands were twisting together, and I looked at her face. She watched Tawny. A moment passed, and then she called her friend’s name.
Tawny twisted toward her. “Yes?”
“You don’t have to stand here beside me,” she said. “You can go and have fun.”
“What?” Tawny’s nose wrinkled. “I’m having fun. Aren’t you?”
“Of course,” Poppy said, but I doubted that. “But you don’t have to be right beside me. You should be out there.” She gestured at those on the main floor. “It’s okay.”
Tawny protested, but Poppy wouldn’t allow it, eventually convincing her that it was all right for her to leave. To socialize. Then Poppy smiled. Not a huge one, but I caught just a glimpse of white teeth. Her friend having fun made her happy—made her smile.
Fuck me.
I wanted her to have fun.
To be happy.
I wanted that smile.
And in a little bit, it would be a long time before she smiled again. Poppy was alone with no effort on my part. The relief I should feel was nowhere to be found.
I stepped in closer to her. “That was kind of you.”
“Not particularly. Why should she stand here and do nothing just because that’s all I can do?”
“Is that really all you can do?”
“You were standing right here when Her Grace reminded me that I am not to mingle or—”
“Or fraternize.”
“She said socialize,” Poppy said.
“But you don’t have to stay here.”
“I don’t.” She turned back to the floor. “I would like to go back to my room.”
I clenched my teeth. “You sure?”
“Of course.”
I stepped aside. “After you, Princess.”
Her eyes narrowed. “You need to stop calling me that.”
“But I like it.”
She brushed past me and lifted the hem of her skirt. “But I don’t.”
“That’s a lie.”
Her lips twitched as she shook her head. I followed her through the throng of masked attendees, none seeming aware of who walked among them. The air was cooler outside the Great Hall. Poppy glanced at one of the open doors that led to the garden.
“Where are you going?” I asked as she continued, hastily looking away from the garden.
Poppy faced me, her nose scrunched against the mask in confusion. “Back to my rooms, as I…”
I started to speak, but my gaze snagged on the fall of her hair and then on the delicate lace of her bodice. “I was wrong earlier when I said you looked lovely.”
“What?” she whispered.
“You look absolutely exquisite, Poppy. Beautiful.” And she really did. “I just…I needed to tell you that.”
Her eyes widened behind the mask as she stared at me—at my face, luckily. If she looked lower, I feared she would see just how true the words were. My gaze returned to the lace of her bodice.
I really needed to get better control of myself.
And I needed to get on with this.
I hadn’t expected to get her alone this quickly or easily. I had some time before Kieran arrived. I could take her to her chambers and coax her back out later, but…
The garden was her place, and I wanted her to see it one last time. I wanted that smile from her.
And if I were being honest with myself, getting her out in the garden now wasn’t just about my plans. It also had to do with the fact that something happened when I spent time with her. Something damn near magical.
I was…I was just me.
Cas.
And fuck if that didn’t feel dangerous. Maybe even idiotic. Because I was self-aware enough to recognize that in my short time of knowing her, a connection had formed between us—a bond that wasn’t at all one-sided. If I had any common sense or were more like I had been before the Blood Crown held me captive, I would nip this shit in the bud. But I wasn’t him anymore. Hadn’t been in decades. I was now far more impulsive and reckless. Selfish. When I wanted, I wanted.
And it wasn’t like there would be many more opportunities for this after tonight.
“I have an idea,” I said, forcing my gaze to hers.
“You do?”
I nodded. “It doesn’t involve returning to your room.”
She drew her lip between her teeth. “I’m confident that unless I remain at the Rite, I would be expected to return to my room.”
“You’re masked, as am I. You’re not dressed like the Maiden,” I pointed out. “To use your own ideology from last night, no one will know who either of us is.”
“Yes, but…”
“Unless you wish to go back to the room.” I started to grin. “Maybe you’re so engrossed in that book—”
Her cheeks turned pink. “I am not engrossed in that book.”
