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“No, you wouldn’t have,” I denied. “You didn’t want war.”
“I didn’t want it, but I could’ve been talked into it. You know Alastir would’ve gotten to me,” he said when I shook my head. “He wanted that long before shit went bad with us and Shea. And I would’ve listened. Fuck, I would’ve let him run the damn kingdom as long as I could do what I wanted, which was whatever required the least amount of effort.”
“You don’t give yourself enough credit,” I muttered. “You never did.”
“That’s something else we’ll have to disagree on.” A few short moments of silence fell as we locked eyes. He exhaled slowly. “I’m sorry, Cas.”
“Don’t.”
“I am. I’m sorry for what you had to believe. I’m sorry for all you had to do. For the pain. For all the death.” His voice dropped. “For Shea.”
I closed my eyes.
“I wish the past was different for us,” he said. “But it’s not, and I don’t think either of us would change very much, would we?”
Not if it jeopardized where we were today, as fucked-up as that was. Rubbing the heel of my palm over my chest, I looked at my brother and thought about how I knew I wouldn’t have done a damn thing differently if I were in Malik’s place.
I dropped my hand, sighing. Knowing that and this conversation didn’t erase all the messy-ass feelings we both had surrounding everything. Our lies. Our guilt. Our fuckups. The blood on our hands.
But we were brothers, and I loved the fucker.
I exhaled long and slow, gaze moving to the door. When I spoke, I kept my voice low. “I’m guessing Millicent still has no idea you’re heartmates?”
Malik’s attention shifted to where mine had. He shook his head.
“You going to tell her?”
“I haven’t really even acted upon it,” he murmured.
My brows flew up. I could only assume he meant getting physical and not the kind that left him bloody. “So, I’m guessing that’s a no?”
Malik nodded.
“Why?” I asked.
A wry smile appeared. “Because she hates me.”
“I don’t think that’s true,” I said, crossing my arms. “When you got hurt out there, she—”
“It’s true,” he cut me off. “She hates me and has every damn reason to.”
I didn’t know what to say to that at first. I had no knowledge of her reasons or what he believed them to be. “Poppy hated me at one point.”
“Yeah, but you haven’t done the things I have,” he said, clearing his throat. “Anyway, there is something you should know. It’s about the Revenants and Kolis.”
His change of subject didn’t pass me by, but I let it slide. “What?”
“Callum made sure all of them knew who their creator was, so those who were loyal to Isbeth? That only went surface-deep. They were loyal to Kolis. And the ones we couldn’t find?” Malik’s eyes met mine. “They’re going to be a problem. They’re going to try everything to bring him to full power and stop anyone who attempts to thwart that.”
Millicent didn’t stay when I re-entered the chamber. Without saying a word, she rose and left. According to Kieran, she’d said nothing while she sat beside Poppy.
She’d only held her hand.
“Everything cool with you?” Kieran asked, picking up a pair of clean breeches. The fact that he’d remained nude by Poppy’s side, not leaving Millie alone, brought forth a smile that was part amused and part, well, proud.
“You heard Malik and me?” I returned to my place beside Poppy.
“Everyone on this floor likely heard you two,” he stated dryly. “At least parts of the conversation.”
I snorted, taking the cup from the nightstand. “Everything is…as good as it can be.”
Kieran pulled up his breeches, fastening the flap. “You think they’ll get better?”
“Possibly.” I took a drink of water, then offered the glass to Delano. He shook his head. “Did you hear what he said about the Revs?” I asked, returning the cup to the nightstand.
“Parts of it.” Bootless, he returned to the bed and sat on Poppy’s other side.
I filled him in, and none of what I’d shared was particularly good news.
But as I’d once told Poppy, I wouldn’t borrow from tomorrow’s problems.
Picking up the hand that Millicent had held, I brought it to my lips. I tabled the shit with Kolis and my brother as I searched for where I’d stopped in my story. We’d been on the road.
To New Haven.
Where everything truly changed.
NEW HAVEN
We arrived in New Haven at dusk, and I knew Poppy had to be tired. We’d been riding for almost twenty-four hours, taking minimal breaks, and there was definitely no more cheese to be found. But as soon as we entered the city, Poppy sat straight and looked around, taking in everything with an expression damn close to wonderment. She probably hadn’t expected much from the small trading town, especially since the mortal elite didn’t flock to the distant city. That benefited us. The Ascended had no reason to check on Lord Halverston, who had once overseen the city, so New Haven was run entirely by Descenters and mortal descendants of Atlantia—unbeknownst to the Blood Crown. That was why the Rise was in good condition, and the rows of homes we rode past were well-kept and far more spacious than what one saw near the Rise in Masadonia.
