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“I don’t know. I’m a mess of thoughts.”
He kissed the top of her head and gave her a squeeze. “We’re having fun. No pressure.”
“I guess I’ve never had fun like this before. And I know the last thing I should be doing is talking about old boyfriends, but Jordy and Mark—the loser before Jordy—really soured me on relationships. When this whole Jen thing broke and I needed Jordy the most, he wanted to show me off at a party. Who does that?”
“An asshole?” Grady offered.
“A total asshole. And to think I tried to make it work with him for three years. Three years! He’d shown me who he was when he didn’t come to Beijing. Why would he suddenly be different?”
“Maybe deep down you were hoping he’d change?”
“Well, that was stupid. How about you? Any losers?” she asked, sipping her wine.
“A few. All of them,” he said and chuckled. “I nearly asked one to marry me. That was a few years before Michelle. Her name was Lana. We’d been dating about a year. She was gorgeous, and she seemed really into me. And I was into her, too. But we didn’t have that much in common. She didn’t like watching sports; she hated playing them even more. She had this weird thing about not wanting to ever sweat. I couldn’t take her out to eat because she’d barely eat food. It was just too much. Thankfully, my sisters talked some sense into me. I can’t imagine being married to her.”
Something tugged at Reese’s heart. The thought of Grady being married…attached to someone else. Even the thought of him wanting to marry someone. Reese had dreamed about that, but it had always seemed out of reach.
“You dodged a bullet.”
“I’ll say.”
He ran his fingers up and down her arm and Reese sighed contentedly. Even though this wasn’t real, it sure felt real, real enough that she didn’t want to let it go. But at the same time, she was scared. After Jordy, the last thing she wanted was another terrible relationship, and she liked Grady too much to jeopardize their friendship. As if reading her thoughts, he spoke.
“Back to not talking about us… We shouldn’t, but I’m going to say how I feel. That’s one thing I learned in therapy. That I bottle too much up, so here it goes. I know we said this was a fun weekend, no attachments, but I want an attachment. I want you to be my real girlfriend. Or at least for us to date. For real. It’s okay if you say no, but I had to say it for myself.”
Even though a bit of panic set in, she still admired him for his honesty. “I don’t want to hurt your feelings—”
“All I’m asking for is that you take some time to think about whether you want to pursue it when this gig is up. And I would like to continue being friends with benefits for now, if you’re agreeable to that.”
“Yes, I’d like that. I think it’s only fair to tell you that I’m not sure I want to be in a relationship again. After Jordy…it’s not that I don’t trust you, I’m just not sure what I want right now.”
“Fair enough. But now it’s out in the open.”
“And that’s refreshing.”
They went inside, watched a movie while cuddling on the couch, and ate the brownies Julia had left for them. Reese wanted to pinch herself. She couldn’t remember when she’d spent so much time with a boyfriend, real or otherwise. With Jordy, it had been dates here and there, and not once had they gone on a vacation together. He barely tolerated her mother and avoided her if possible. When it came to Cam, he was completely dismissive. And the sex? Reese had always craved the closeness, anything she could get, but it was so mechanical and all about Jordy and what he wanted to do. With Grady, everything was magnetic with a surge of adrenaline. And dare she say a little magical? But a relationship? What would happen when they eventually broke up? She’d lose him forever, though she wondered if there was any going back anyway.
These thoughts so consumed her that she barely noticed when the movie ended.
“Want to sleep outside tonight? I can set it up. It may not be the most comfortable, but the patio furniture transforms into a makeshift bed, and I can set the netting over the gazebo. We can sleep under the stars.”
“That sounds wonderful.”
“You get the pillows and blankets from our bed, and I’ll set everything up.”
She changed into her tank top and shorts and grabbed what they needed from the bed. When she got outside, Grady had transformed the deck into a bedroom, complete with some candles. Had he done this all for her? Her eyes stung with tears, but she refused to let them fall. No man had ever been this good to her.
“I’ll go change and be right back,” he said.
While he was gone, Reese set up the bed, laying out the blankets and fluffing the pillows. When Grady returned, he took her hand and they slipped under the blankets. The evening was cooler than she’d expected, and Grady sensed it. He pulled her close and wrapped a blanket around them.
“I know it’s not like a bed,” Grady said.
“It’s perfect,” she said, reaching up to kiss his cheek.
Snug and warm, she drifted off to sleep. She didn’t know how much time had passed, but she was awakened by Grady. He was kissing her neck and working his way down her body. First the spot between her breasts, then down to her belly button.
“This is a pleasant way to wake up,” she said.
