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The stupid thing brought out the memories that I’ve worked so hard to keep buried. Between that and it being the two-year anniversary of when mom told us about her cancer, it’s no wonder my head is all messed up.
“It’s just bruises,” I repeat. “Just bruises. Nothing else.”
Still, no matter how many times I repeat it, that night, I don’t fall asleep.
CHAPTERFOUR
JADE
I nibble at my nail, my attention to the front of the auditorium, only half listening to my English lit teacher go on and on about one dead poet or another.
Like seriously? Who cares? I highly doubt any of them were as clever and deep as we were trying to make them out to be. Just because he used dark colors in his poems doesn’t mean he was depressed or heartbroken, Margaret. Maybe he just liked dark colors.
Letting out a sigh, I move the word document to the side, not that I actually wrote any notes in it whatsoever, the open browser behind it coming into focus. My throat grows tight as I read over the words on the screen—early breast cancer signs and symptoms.
I tried to let it go, tried to push it out of my head, but it was impossible. A part of me—a big part of me—didn’t want to know the answer to my questions, but the other part of me couldn’t let go of it either. It was a vicious cycle that had me up at night, my brain conjuring all the possible scenarios.
But the thing about the internet? It was a rabbit hole, and once you opened it, there was no coming back, just one long dark spiral into a bottomless abyss.
Did it stop me?
Nope.
I click on one of the links, wait for the page to upload, and then read. Page after page, article after article, until my heart starts to race faster, and my vision blurs with all the information.
“Jade?” A hand lands on my elbow, snapping me out of my thoughts. “Jade!”
I turn to Penny. Her head is tilted to the side, and her brows are pulled together. “Sorry, Pens. I got lost in my thoughts for a little bit.”
And not just for a little bit, either. People are collecting their laptops and books as they get out of their seats. I was out long enough to miss the rest of the class.
“I can’t really blame you,” she pulls her hand back and closes her laptop and braille keyboard, putting them into her bag, so I do the same. “This was really boring. Is it bad if I just want to go back to one of my music classes?”
“You’re reading my mind. Whoever thought we should attend gen-ed classes in college was an idiot. Are you done with classes for today?”
“Yes. You ready to go?” she asks, her fingers curling around the harness.
“Ready when you are.”
I wait as Penny gives Henry the command, letting them leave in front of me. The class had emptied out a bit, but there were still some people mingling around. A few of them gave Penny curious looks as she made her way to the door. I glance up at the hallway entrance and see a group of girls standing by the door, their eyes on Penny as they giggle. Or not so curious. I scowl at them.
“Seriously, don’t they have something better to do?” I mutter to myself, but of course, the comment doesn’t go unnoticed.
“Just ignore them.”
I shift my attention to Penelope. “How do you even know what I’m talking about?”
She rolls her eyes, not bothering to stop. “I can’t see, but that doesn’t mean I don’t feel their stares on me or hear them for that matter.”
I guess there is that. Penny might be blind, but she’s not deaf and definitely not stupid. No, she’s kind, independent, and so freaking smart. Like seriously, I can see, and I get lost more often than not. Penny? No way. It’s like she has some inner GPS or something.
Moving forward, I push the door open and hold it so Penelope and Henry can get out. “You’d think we left petty bullshit back in high school.”
“You’d think that,” Penelope agrees, grabbing onto the railing and making her way down the stairs. “You have any plans for tonight?”
I pull out my phone and check the group chat. “Rei and Grace are home, and they ordered Mexican. You in?”
“Sounds like a plan.”
