AllFreeNovel
Share Us
* * *
Groaning softly,I turn around. My muscles still feel tight and achy, but at least I’m not shivering any longer, so that’s a win.
Blinking my eyes open, I’m met with the dim light illuminating the room.
And Prescott.
My heart does a little flip as I just stare at him, unsure if this is really happening or if I’m still dreaming.
These days it is hard to differentiate between the two.
I reach forward, my fingers tracing his scruffy jaw.
“You’re really here,” I whisper, staring at Prescott’s familiar face lying on the pillow next to mine.
He’s really here.
“I’m here. I’m sorry, Jade. I know I had no right to come, not after everything that has happened, but…”
“What’s going on?” Something must have happened to set him off and made him come all this way.
“What didn’t happen?” He lets out a humorless chuckle. “I went home, got in another fight with my dad, which led me to visit my brother’s grave, and then I found Mom sitting in Gabriel’s room only to get into a fight with her, and the only thing that was on my mind was to come back home. To come back to you.”
“Prescott…” I shake my head, my throat feeling tight.
“I was surprised when Nixon didn’t punch me in the face the moment he opened the door, so I figured you didn’t tell him.”
“No, there wasn’t time.”
Prescott gives me a pointed look which clearly states that he knows I’m full of crap, which I am. We’d been in this house for weeks, there was plenty of time to tell him what happened, but I didn’t want to. Saying it would mean admitting the truth, and I wasn’t ready to do that. It meant that this thing between Prescott and me was actually over, and I didn’t want that to be true.
Prescott extends his hand, his fingers sliding through mine.
“When everything else goes to shit, I always come back to one person. You. You’re my person, Jade. You’re my everything, and I hate myself for pushing you away when all I want to do is hold you close.”
“I hate you for making me fall in love with you.” I start to pull my hand out of his, but he doesn’t let me budge. “That’s what you said the last time we talked. I can’t keep doing this, Prescott. I can’t keep playing your games. I can’t keep watching you walk away, I…”
“I’m not going anywhere, Jade. I need you like I need the fucking air to breathe.”
“Then why do you keep pushing me away?!” I ask, my voice breaking. I bite the inside of my cheek to stop the tears from forming. God, I hate myself when I’m like this.
So weak. So needy.
“Because I’m scared, okay? I’m so fucking scared of losing you. I’m so fucking scared of being the reason you die.”
The reason you…
“What are you talking about? I have cancer, Prescott. That’s not your fault. None of it is. If I die, it’ll be because of the cancer and not something any of us did.”
“But it would have been. If something had happened that day after the game, it would have been my fault. Just like Gabriel’s death is my fault.”
“Prescott, no…”
He shakes his head even before I can finish. “It’s true. I killed him. I let him convince me that going out would be a good idea. He was so miserable being stuck in the hospital, and he just wanted to get out. You should have seen his face—the relief when he breathed in some fresh air. We were thirteen-year-old boys, and he was happy tobreathe.How fucked up is that? And then, instead of going straight inside after we got the ball, we started to play catch right there in the open. He was so happy, and after months I finally had my brother back, so the time got away from us. When we got back inside, it was too late. Gabriel had already been fighting an infection, and being outside in the freezing night in the middle of November was the stupidest thing we could have done. His fever spiked, and the infection spread. He died shortly after.”
I press my hand against my mouth, trying to fight tears.
Now it all made sense.
