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It has to be enough.
I move closer to her, my lips parting, but before I can say anything, Spencer yells: “Wentworth, you going? The guys are already at the gym.”
I close my eyes, letting out a shaky breath.
“Coming,” I say, opening my eyes to find Jade watching me, a worried expression on her face.
“You’re going to the gym? What about your—”
“My leg’s fine.” That familiar pressure in my knee mocks me. “Well, not fine,fine, but better. The doctor told me I can still exercise as long as I don’t overwork myself, and trust me, the guys don’t let me overwork myself.”
“I know, but…” Her teeth sink into her lower lip, and she shakes her head. “Forget it.”
“But what?” I ask, genuinely wanting to know. Or maybe I just want to prolong this as much as possible. Because if she’s talking to me, I don’t have to look for a reason to stay.
“But why the gym? Working out and pushing yourself were the reasons why you ended up like this in the first place.”
“I guess there is that…” I rub the back of my neck. “But it’s also the only reason why I stay sane these days. The only thing that keeps my demons at bay.”
Jade’s eyes widen in understanding.
A small smile works its way to my lips. “I want to get better, Jade.”
I want to get better for you. But also for me too.
I don’t say those words because I know they won’t bring anything good to either of us, so instead, I take a step back. “I should go.”
“Okay.”
With a nod, I turn and go for the door, but at the last second, I stop in the doorway. “Jade?”
“Yes?”
I place my hand against the wood. “You don’t have to leave again,” I say slowly, weighing my words. “I won’t be in your way if you don’t want me to. I promise.”
It might kill me, but I’m going to stay true to my words.
Because the idea of her going back home, so far away from everything and everyone, scares me shitless. At least this way, she’s going to be safe and surrounded by people who love her, even if that can’t be me.
Not giving her a chance to answer me, I push from the doorway. Spencer is talking with Grace in the hallway. They both turn toward me when they hear me come.
“Let’s go,” I mutter as I head toward the door. My gaze meets Grace’s, and I give her a curt nod. “Grace.”
With that, I leave before I do something stupid.
Like march back into that apartment, grab Jade, kiss her senselessly, and beg her to take me back.
* * *
“What has your panties in a twist?”Nixon asks, eyeing me from above. I push the bar in my hand, too focused on breathing through the set to answer him. Not that I’d answer him anyway. What was there to say? I was inches away from your sister, and now I have to beat this need coursing through me to go back to her into submission?
Yeah, right. Like that’ll go over well.
“Your sister has,” Spencer smirks.
“What?” Nixon bellows just as my arms give out on me mid-set. Thankfully, he catches it just in time before it crushes me. “Where the fuck did you see Jade?” he asks, holding the bar just above me. A part of me wonders if he’s playing with the idea of “accidentally” letting it drop. With him, you can never be too sure. Not when Jade’s in question.
“Yeah, Spencer. Tell him where we saw Jade,” I coax. After all, the dude just threw me under the bus, and it’s not like he’s clean in all of this.
