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“Holden!” A small hand reached for mine, our fingers stretching to reach each other. An arm slipped around the waist of the faceless person calling my name. In seconds they were taken away. Screams and cries rang in my ears, and I curled into myself, pulling my hair in order to make it all stop.
“No!” I cried. “No!” I rocked back and forth, begging for someone to help me, but it was no use. No one was coming.
I jolted upright, trembling and searching the room. Straightening my twisted shirt, I willed myself to breathe. My heart jackhammered against my ribs, and nausea rolled in my stomach. I sucked in air as I realized Brynn was asleep next to me. The clock read four twenty-nine. I’d been comatose for almost two hours. But those fucking nightmares were showing up more and more. Jesus, what was happening to me?
Little did I know that I was about to learn so much more than my father’s dark secrets, and that he would be the least of my concerns.
Chapter Thirteen
The morning sun filtered through the blinds, and I winced when I turned my head. Apparently, after my nightmare, I’d fallen back to sleep. I massaged the stiff muscles in my neck and realized Brynn was no longer next to me. She would never understand how much she’d helped me last night.
I sat up and placed my bare feet on the soft, tan rug. Scrubbing my face with my hands, a massive dose of reality slapped me silly—no River. No club. I grabbed my phone off the nightstand and checked the clock, then shoved it into the front pocket of my shorts. It was a little after nine. Time to figure some shit out.
Running my fingers through my hair, it finally dawned on me that all of my toiletries and clothes had been at the penthouse. “Fuck,” I muttered. I wasn’t even sure anything was salvageable. If it was, did I want to rebuild, move locations, or walk away?
I rose, wishing to hell River was with me to weigh in on the situation. I wondered if she might want a separate place to live from the club. Maybe even a log home on the water. My heart ached as I recalled her reaction to the Spokane River. She’d been elated. Happy. I longed to touch her, stroke her soft cheek with my thumb. Grief speared me in the chest. If I sat around, I was afraid the not knowing would fucking kill me, and I had to stay sane. I had to believe that she’d be back soon.
I left the bedroom and located the coffee pot. After rummaging through the cabinets, I discovered a big-ass mug and filled it to the top. As exhausted as I was, I needed an IV drip of caffeine.
“Hey, man,” Chance said as he joined me in the kitchen. “Brynn said you slept for a little while. That’s good.”
“Yeah. She gave me a sleeping pill to help. I don’t feel groggy this morning, so I guess it worked like she said it would.” I sipped the steaming liquid and leaned against the counter. “Where are Brynn and Jace?”
“Jace bounced as soon as he woke up and Brynn is making a list of essentials you and River lost in the fire. I think she’s going to see what she can gather for you today while you deal with other shit.”
“She’s the best.” I eyed my friend, waiting to see if there was a hint of jealousy concerning my relationship with Brynn. I didn’t see any, which didn’t surprise me. Our friendships were deep, and we were connected on many levels that most people would never experience. But I suspected there were more feelings on Chance’s part with Brynn. Hers too. It was time to test the water.
I leaned forward and looked him in the eye. “Does she know you’re in love with her?”
Chance should have been a bodyguard because he never even flinched. I had to give him major kudos for the poker face.
Without batting an eye, he said, “No.” Then he walked around me and rinsed the plate and fork he’d had in his hand. He opened the stainless-steel dishwasher and loaded it. One thing I liked about Chance was he kept shit clean, unlike Jace. Jace wouldn’t load his dishes until he didn’t have any clean ones left in the cabinets. He would carefully stack every bowl, cup, and piece of silverware in the sink before he finally gave in.
I nearly spilled my drink as I watched him. “I wasn’t expecting that answer.”
“Me either, but there it is. Sometimes I think we could make it work, but then she’s dating a girl or fucking Jace and … maybe I’m not enough for her.” He focused on cleaning the black and white marble countertop instead of looking at me. This was hard for him. “Not to mention I’m pretty sure that Jace has some feelings for her, too.”
“Share her. If she feels the same way about both of you, then make it work.” I gave him a half-shrug as though it was the easiest thing in the world to do.
Chance faced me. “I’d be fine with it for a while. I mean as things are now, we’re already with her so to speak. But I’d want to be the only one she was with, and I’m not sure she can give me that kind of commitment.” Regret flashed across his features. “It’s not like you and River. You both only want each other. No one else. We all literally watched you two fall in love. Every time we all hung out, we saw the feelings grow deeper. It was pretty amazing from this perspective. I want that as well. Call me a romantic, but Brynn’s worth it.”
Chance had always been a player. Out of the eleven years we’d been friends, this was the only conversation where I’d heard him talk about settling down. Hell, we’d all wanted Brynn for ourselves at one time or another, but this was more.
My phone vibrated, and I removed it from my pocket. A message from Pierce flashed across the screen.
Any news on the fire?
I had to appreciate Pierce’s direct communication. My thumbs danced over the keyboard with a response.
No. I’m hoping to hear something soon.
Tiny black dots bounced as I waited for his reply.
Can you come over? I have some news. Before you ask, it’s best not to say anything over the phone.
I glanced up at Chance. “Pierce has an update. I’m going to head over that way.”
“Good luck, man. I know you could use it. I’ll go with Brynn to grab you some clothes and shit. Can’t have you borrowing my underwear.” Chance chuckled. “Well, I guess you already are since I go commando.” He nodded at the shorts I was wearing and flashed me an ornery smile.
