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Reid continued to run his fingertips along the buttery, cream-colored leather seats. I was in awe of the gorgeous plane as well, but my brain wasn’t soaking in the details like Reid’s was. We dipped and bounced with some turbulence, and Reid’s knee began to bounce. He calmed down after Holden explained to him what was happening. A part of me wondered if it would be fun witnessing Reid explore his new surroundings, or if it would continue to break my heart. I had to figure out a way to cope with the situation and with my guilt. Even though I’d lived through hell, I hadn’t lived through the same hell he had.
We landed at the Spokane airport a little after two in the morning. Sutton and Pierce had offered for us to stay at their house, but Holden and I had politely declined. We needed to help Reid settle in and have some privacy. Brian wouldn’t meet us at Pierce’s place until the following day in the late afternoon, so we might be able to grab a few hours of sleep. I wasn’t sure I would be able to, but I’d try.
Once again, we climbed into a Westbrook Security-owned Mercedes and buckled in for the last leg of the trip. Holden’s club was only twenty minutes away. My head throbbed with the idea of walking back into the same place from where I’d been abducted. Anxiety hummed beneath my skin, and my grip on Holden’s hand tightened.
I glanced up at him.
“Hey, it’s okay.” He stroked my cheek with the pad of his thumb. “Now that we’re in Spokane, I need to tell you something.”
I shifted in my seat, facing him. “What is it?”
Holden massaged the back of his neck and sighed. “While you were gone, the club … it caught on fire. Everything is gone, babe.”
“What?” I screeched a little too loudly. I shook my head in disbelief. “We … you lost everything?” This wasn’t what I’d wanted to happen. I wanted to move forward, return to work, and live in the penthouse. Just not yet. A sudden and unexpected relief washed over me. My expression must have given me away.
“River?”
I slumped in the seat, my fingers fidgeting in my lap. “I wasn’t sure I could go back, and I was scared to tell you.”
Holden’s jaw clenched, the muscle in his face popping. “You can’t do that. River, you have to be a hundred percent honest with me. I was already worried about that. If it were me, I’m not sure I could return to the scene of the crime. I had to see the place you were kidnapped from every single day, and it was fucking torture. Maybe 4 Play burning to the ground was a blessing in disguise.”
I sniffled and wiped my nose with the back of my arm and stared at my dirty jeans. I hadn’t had a fresh change of clothes since my last visit to Dr. Austin a few days ago. “Returning to the club hadn’t crossed my mind until now. I’ve stayed in a cell or … in a hole beneath a guard’s house. Every fucked-up minute, I was in survival mode.” My fingers balled into fists. “I can’t do this right now,” I whispered and turned away from him, the images assaulting my brain, stealing my breath away. How the hell would I deal with everything now that I was safe again? I never thought this day would happen, so I’d shoved all the pain and anger down, using it for protection and to keep myself alive.
I peeked at Holden. Tears glistened on his cheeks. “I never meant to put you in danger.”
Sadness tingled in my stomach, and I took his hand in mine. “I know. You’re going to have to forgive yourself.”
“So are you. Ditching Zayne … it was a normal reaction after the pregnancy test.”
A part of me realized that he was right, but my poor decision had landed me in a training compound, ready to be sold to some sick asshole overseas. Bile swam up to my throat. I swallowed, forcing my stomach to behave. “Maybe, but it was a reaction that cost me dearly. It cost all of us so much, Holden.”
We sat in silence for a few minutes. “Where are we going to stay?” I nodded to Reid in the front seat.
“Chance’s place. You and I will take Chance’s room and Reid can have one of the guest rooms. We’ll get things worked out.”
I frowned, my mind spinning faster than a weathervane in a tornado. “Where’s Chance? For that matter, can I see everyone tomorrow? And how in the hell did our home and club catch on fire?”
“I’ll tell you about the club later. Chance and Brynn are in Portland on business for a while.”
“Business?” What the fuck had happened while I was gone?
“Yeah, hopefully they’ll be back soon. Jace is at Chance’s waiting for us.” His attention fell to his lap, then back to me. “River, you have my word, I’ll tell you everything tomorrow, but for tonight, I need to just hold you. Is that okay?”
“Yeah,” I whispered, grateful I didn’t have to blow his world wide-open with the truth about his family yet.
***
Half an hour later, Zayne pulled into the driveway of a tan house with black trim. I hadn’t ever seen Chance’s place before. Even through the darkness, I could see the abundance of leafy trees. The home was nestled toward the back of the property, allowing for privacy.
We all climbed out of the car. My muscles were screaming at me. The cell had been cramped, and the trip home had been long. I was definitely ready to walk around and try to eat something.
I rounded the vehicle, slid my arm through Holden’s, and took Reid’s hand, giving it a gentle squeeze.
Holden glanced at Reid, his gaze traveling down to our interlocked fingers. He gave Reid a tight-lipped smile. “This is where my friend Chance lives. We’re going to stay here for a few days. Make yourself at home. If you want to shower, then I’ll give you shorts and a T-shirt to change into. Hell, I probably have some boxer briefs that are still in the package that you can have. After the fire, Brynn went shopping for me.” Holden cringed, then quickly masked his expression.
“I guess I hadn’t considered clothes. The … work always supplied mine.” Reid fidgeted, obviously feeling awkward with the conversation.
Holden patted him on the back. “Not anymore.”
