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Brynn tucked her hair behind her ear. “We’ll save that for another day. All you need to think about is healing. Holden loves you so much, River. I’ve never seen him so crazy about anyone—ever. If you decide to tell him what happened, he’ll scour the earth looking for that man.”
“He won’t have to. Barrett is in custody.”
Brynn’s gaze narrowed. “That could be good and bad. Holden has the means to bribe people when necessary. I don’t think Barrett’s safe.” She shrugged. “Meh, you win some you lose some.” Her tone was nonchalant as she gave me a knowing look.
“I miss Holden. I want to be with him so much, Brynn. We tried, but I freaked out.” I sank my teeth into my lower lip.
“You dealt with Dan, so do the same thing now. Try to compartmentalize, babe. The guard isn’t any different.”
I understood what she was saying, but I wasn’t sure how to do it again. I’d had years of practice with Dan. This was fresh and raw in my mind.
“I have a feeling that things will move forward after you talk to Holden. Even though I know in my heart he won’t see you any differently, you need to hear him say it yourself.” She smiled at me, sadness in her features. “And when he tells you it’s not your fault and to not ever blame yourself again, I imagine it will free you. You’ll be able to reconnect with Holden again.”
I stared at her, searching for any sign that she was trying to simply make me feel better. “I hope so. I love him so much. I’m scared things won’t go back to the way they were.”
“He knows how you feel about him. Holden’s been through a lot of shit, babe. He can handle this. He’s strong.”
“Okay. I’ll talk to him.” I fidgeted with the hem of my shirt, unease blooming to life in my belly.
“Is there anything else you need to tell me?”
I shook my head no. “Not now. The rest are details of living in a dark hole for days beneath Barrett’s house, then witnessing young kids being sexually abused and beaten. I’m not ready to talk about it, yet.” I pursed my lips together, willing myself not to say Reid’s name.
“Jesus. I can’t imagine.”
“I couldn’t either, but I have to try to move on the best I can until they catch Opal and Kassandra.” Realizing my slip, I quickly explained as much as I could. Holden had to tell her the rest. “They’re the two women behind the sex ring.”
Brynn gasped, her mouth moving up and down, but no words were coming out. “Women?” she squeaked.
“It’s fucked up. But I’ll save that for another day. I want to spend time with everyone without a ton of dark shit hanging over our heads.” Plus, I realized once she saw Reid, there would be a lot more conversation. “How are you feeling? Are you tired?” I asked, changing the subject.
“No. I’m bored.” Her soft laugh filled the area. “I’m off the chemo for a bit, so it should help.”
I took her hand in mine. “I’m so sorry you’re going through this.”
“Don’t.” Her tone was firm and left zero room for negotiation. “I’m getting better. You’re home, and I’m ready to have some fun with everyone. I don’t want to talk about my treatment, or anything shitty. Hell, I think having as many orgasms as possible this week will help.” A playful smile eased across her features.
“Well, you’ll definitely have eye candy. Not only is Zayne with us but so is Vaughn. Holden booked the penthouse for all of us as well.”
“Good. They’re not prying us apart unless I’m asleep or with Chance and Jace.” She winked at me.
The door opened, and a young nurse wearing pink scrubs rolled a wheelchair over to the side of Brynn’s bed. “You ready to get out of here for a few days?” She smiled at Brynn.
“Hell, yes. My bestie is here to hang out with me. We’re going to have our nails done along with a bikini wax. I want to be pampered and play.” Her laugh echoed through the room, and my anxiety calmed. I assumed it would be one day at a time with cancer, but I was grateful to be with her again. We could talk more once we were settled in at the hotel. If Brynn wanted some pampering, then I would see if they offered anything at the hotel.
While Brynn was preparing to leave, I texted Holden about some appointments, and his response was almost immediate, assuring me that he would take care of it.
Almost as quickly as we arrived, we left the Knight Center, but with Brynn. Chance walked with Zayne as I stayed next to Brynn, my mind spinning with how she would react when she met Reid.
Suddenly, an idea occurred to me. “Is Catherine still in Portland? I thought your parents were here, too.”
Brynn looked up at me, a faraway expression on her face. “My folks left early this morning. Work.” Her words were clipped, angry.
“That’s messed up.”
“It’s worse when they’re around, so they did me a favor. Catherine is still here. She’s in the same hotel as we are. I’m glad Catherine has been around. She’s been really good to Chance and me.”
My pulse skyrocketed. I wasn’t looking forward to the conversation about Reid with her. Holden had been furious when it was confirmed that he and Reid were brothers. In my mind, there were too many possibilities, and I was determined to refrain from judgment until Catherine shared her story. My biggest fear? That Holden would lose his mom, and he would spiral. I was fucked up myself; I had no clue how to help him through this.
