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CHAPTER FIFTEEN
Imust be out of mymind.
One day I’m taken hostage and threatened with my life, the next I’m having sex with my captor. What is wrong with me?
And it’s not just my average sex. It involved spanking and pain—my nipples are still a little sore—and incredible orgasms.
My brain can’t process it all as I sit in bed the following morning. Rafe is gone. He was so quiet, I didn’t even hear him leave. I rub my temples. Not only did I allow a man I barely knew tospankme, I forgot I had wanted to try my brother again.
Thatshould be my focus.
Getting out of bed, I head to the bathroom to brush my teeth, wash my face, and take a nice hot shower. I try not to relive the moments from last night as the water cascades down my front and back from the twin showerheads on opposite sides of the shower, but I remember everything, from the moment I thought he was going to kiss me—and wish he had—to how I felt ready to collapse from all the cowgirl riding. I remember how desperately my body wanted to climax, so much so that I did what he wanted. I called him “Sir,” I asked permission to come, I thanked him.
It was in my interest to play along, but I have the sinking suspicion that even if my life wasn’t on the line, I’d do the same.
After the shower and drying my hair, I pick out a pair of linen shorts and a soft pullover top with cold shoulders.
The same woman from yesterday knocks on my door with breakfast. This time it’s a decadent quiche with what must be fresh-baked croissants, because the taste and texture isamazing. I wonder how the woman has such good timing, showing up with breakfast without waking me.
I enjoy the breakfast but eat it kind of quickly, because what I really want to do is talk to Rafe. I want to know if he’s heard from Alessandro and if I can try to reach my brother again. However, when I go in search of him, one of the security guards tells me that he’s out.
I decide to take another walk of the grounds and see how far I can get. Going through the gardens, I eventually reach a stone wall about thirty feet high with barbed wire at the top. I also spot a security camera. Trying a different part of the compound doesn’t net better results. Instead of a stone wall, I come across razor fencing that, as one poor butterfly discovered, is electrified.
No wonder Rafe lets me wander about freely. He knows I’m not escaping this prison.
Making my way to the library, I pick up Iris Chang’s book and find a reading nook on the second floor to read a little more. The Reverend John Magee was an American missionary in Nanking who documented the atrocities. The Legation Secretary of the German Embassy described an incident involving several soldiers who entered the home of the Hsia family. After dragging the mother from where she hid with her 1-year old baby, they raped the mother and thrust a bottle into her vagina. They baby was bayoneted. Her other daughters, aged 16 and 14, were also raped and defiled while the youngest, aged 2, was split down the head with a sword.
––––––––
ICAN’T READ OR SEEmuch more. The photos of women whose dead bodies were profaned by bayonets sticking out of their vaginas is too much.
I feel sick with a mix of rage and sorrow. When I get up, I stumble away from my reading spot. I don’t understand how humans can be so cruel. I would say it’s pure evil, but that makes it sound like an outside force perpetrated the atrocities, minimizing the responsibility of the individual.
Losing my footing on the last step, I drop the book and land into the arms of Raphael Lee. At first I’m glad that I haven’t crashed to the ground, but then I remember that this is a man who has committed his share of violence. I yank myself away.
“What’s the matter?” Rafe demands as he holds onto my arm.
He looks sharp in a pinstriped suit, like he’s a businessman instead of a gangster. I tremble as I wonder if this is a man capable of the same horrors as the Japanese soldiers.
